50/50 split

[Jane798]

Hi all, I am only just starting to think about separating/divorce. I am in an unhappy possible emotionally abusive relationship. I know he would want 50/50 custody and do think its so important they have a relationship with him. I just wonder how any of you Mums cope with not seeing your kids half of the week. I am struggling to see how I would manage without seeing them. Please be kind just after others opinions that have been/going though it. Thanks

This is me also.
I don’t feel I could stand it.
i recognise he may feel similarly.
Neither of us ‘deserve’ more time with the children than the other (although I have been main parent) - so both of us just stick it out in a pretty miserable marriage.

I asked my husband for a divorce in January this year. I lost a parent recently and it put things in perspective. I had been unhappy for a long time and had tried a few times to talk to DH about this but is never got resolved. In the last few years we have defaulted to a housemate relationship really and it was making me really lonely, I craved affection and connection. I suggested counselling but he refused until I said a few months after that I wanted a divorce - then he said he would give it a try . I just didn’t have it in me - I had emotionally checked out a few years before and his lack of support or interest in me had made me resent him. I have been left to do pretty much everything in our life and for our two DDs. We have now been separated for nearly 6 months, I don’t really miss him apart from the practical things but I do miss being part of a family and I know my girls are finding it hard. He is also really struggling as without us he doesn’t really have a lot. He never had any interests outside us. I am now considering if I should give the marriage another go, wondering if I could try a bit harder to make it work, I am at the point where my mind is exhausted of everything I keep thinking about and almost just want things to go back to being normal (and boring) is there anyone who has been though a similar thing and gone back - wondering how it was? He has never says he loves me as I don’t think emotional he can but I do know deep down he does, I am just worried that he won’t change and in a few years I will be back to square one ! He moved into a rental property so we have been living separately and haven’t really seen much of each other .