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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

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Original poster

Documents you need to start the divorce process - is it difficult to apply?

23 replies

missxellen · 05/08/2022 15:54

Hi,

question for people who applied - what documents do you need? Is it just marriage certificate? I've been dating a separated man and he's been postponing the divorce for ages. Now he's telling me he's been completing the documents. I know he has his marriage certificate, and form what I've read online, that's the only document you actually need. He told me he and his wife have to show proofs of address for the last 5 years as well, and they need passports and other ID's as well. Is that true?

He's been also telling me he needs a lawyer to apply. He has one, but he's on holidays now. I've looked at the application and it looks quite not complicated to me, even though I am not English native speaker, I think I could do it myself. Do you really need a lawyer to apply?

Please someone help me. I feel like my partner is just finding another excuses not to apply now, and he's arguing with me and calling me an idiot who doesn't know the law.

OP posts:

DoverShortcutPlan · 05/08/2022 15:58

It's so easy to do online, I actually accidentally did mine!! Didn't realise it was the actual divorce I was applying for. Had to post marriage certificate. That was all.
It was a straightforward, no fault,5 year separation divorce.

DoverShortcutPlan · 05/08/2022 15:59

Do you really want to be with someone who calls you stupid?

MaxOverTheMoon · 05/08/2022 16:03

It's so easy and all you need to upload online is a picture of your marriage certificate. You can request another copy of it through the registrar office if you don't have it.

The financial consent order is trickier but that's seperate to the divorce.

JengaCupboard · 05/08/2022 16:06

You don't need a solicitor to apply - in fact you don't necessarily need a solicitor for anything - the only thing I used one for was to sort out our TR1 forms (transfer of ownership of property which does require legal input by law). I'm not suggesting people do this without legal advice, i'm just stating that depending on circumstances you don't legally need a solicitor to get divorced.

As I vaguely remember you just fill the form out on line and pay about £550.00 - I may have needed my marriage certificate possibly (copies are easily obtained) but I don't remember needing an awful lot - if anything I remember thinking how scarily easy it was for such a massive decision.

Bear in mind though this is just the actual divorce, i.e. terminating of the legal marriage contract - what it doesn't allow for is all the agreements and financial arrangements that need to be agreed ahead of the absolute being applied for, and most people would use legal advice to aid this.

If you go on to the gov.uk website you can see all the forms and requirements for yourself as its all there in the public domain...

Milkand2sugarsplease · 05/08/2022 16:07

Bloody hell it was the easiest thing in the world to do - both deciding to do it and filling in the online form.

Original poster

missxellen · 05/08/2022 16:20

Thank you everyone for the response. So I was right. :(

I really don't understand why my partner is doing this.

I hope more people will respond and I can show it to him, although I am sure he will just pretend he didn't see it. :(

His wife and him only share some savings together, they don't have any properties, also no kids.

I just don't unerstand why he's doing everything to postpone it.

OP posts:

waterSpider · 05/08/2022 16:52

Sorting out finances and child arrangements can be difficult, but the other stuff (the legal divorce) is very straightforward. I did mine mainly because I was better at form-filling than my ex and that was before the easier no-fault stuff we now have.

Swannning · 05/08/2022 16:59

Yep you just fill out a form online and it starts the process. IIRC I submitted the form, then a week or so later XH got the petition, signed and sent it back and then I got confirmation of this, it went before a judge and we got the decree nisi and then six weeks later the absolute - we didn't even get paper copies of our decrees, it was emailed to me as a PDF.

There is a long wait between respondent's (I think that is what it is called - XH in my case) form being received by the courts and them processing it to go to court (maybe 5 months or so from start to finish)

I would say he is lying - sorry

Newuname199987 · 05/08/2022 17:43

You just put some info into gov.uk and attach a photo of your wedding certificate and it’s really straightforward. It then emails your spouse and they fill in a few boxes. No need for passports or anything apart from marriage certificate and it tells you how to get a copy if it’s lost.
As others have said there is a different process to agree financial matters that can run alongside the actual divorce so that the finances get agreed by the time the divorce is done.
As you’ve seen for yourself it’s really easy, to start it off online took me 10 minutes.

Original poster

missxellen · 05/08/2022 17:53

Thank you again for the responses.

I showed it to my partner. He said he believes the government website and his legally trained lawyer, not "my stupid f... forums"

On the website it says marriage certificate only. I checked it.

Please, if more people could leave their responses, I would appreciate that.

OP posts:

toobusytothink · 05/08/2022 17:56

And you want to be with him because???? The lack of getting a divorce is the least of your worries if that is how he speaks to you!

toobusytothink · 05/08/2022 17:58

Oh and I applied for the divorce myself online. It’s a matter of ticking a few boxes. The nisi is very easy to get. The rest is more complicated and he may well need a solicitor for the financial order. But with no kids involved even that shouldn’t be too hard

2bazookas · 05/08/2022 18:03

His wife and him only share some savings together, they don't have any properties, also no kids.

That's what he's told you; but now you know he's told other lies about his divorce. So maybe they do have property, and kids, and maybe he's still married and living with her in the family home and has no intention of leaving or divorcing.

Original poster

missxellen · 05/08/2022 18:16

2bazookas, no no, they are definitely separated, I lived with him at some point, also I've met his family and friends and even spoke with the wife, so definitely no.

For me it was a problem from the beginning, that he's separated not divorced, and he's been promising me that divorce for ages now. I am so impatient that we have awful arguments about it and we both just insult each other.

I really don't understand why he's still postponing it. He was the one who left her.

OP posts:

DoverShortcutPlan · 05/08/2022 18:22

He's not a good man.

JengaCupboard · 05/08/2022 20:23

@missxellen he’s bullshitting you.. or at least putting you off.

I assume all PP’s including myself have been through the process unlike him. You can engage a solicitor and I’m sure they make money by creating imaginary hoops to jump through which could be the case, but ultimately they’re only filing the same form just on your behalf. I guess it would be fair to say that some people may go straight to a solicitor without investigating first, so it may genuinely be what his has asked for, but there are other routes. No one here has any reason to misguide you.

personally I would be seriously reviewing the wider situation based on his attitude.

Swannning · 06/08/2022 14:05

missxellen · 05/08/2022 17:53

Thank you again for the responses.

I showed it to my partner. He said he believes the government website and his legally trained lawyer, not "my stupid f... forums"

On the website it says marriage certificate only. I checked it.

Please, if more people could leave their responses, I would appreciate that.

So if he believes the government website why isn't he just clicking the link and applying: www.gov.uk/divorce/file-for-divorce

It says:
To apply for a divorce you’ll need:

yours and your husband or wife’s full name and address
your original marriage certificate or a certified copy (and a certified translation if it’s not in English)
proof of your name change if you’ve changed it since you got married - for example your marriage certificate or a deed poll

That is it...he is feeding you a line OP sorry. And he also speaks to you dreadfully - you deserve better than being with a liar

2022NewTimes · 06/08/2022 18:28

@missxellen I applied online last week and it took me ten minutes to start the process - only paperwork needed to start the ball rolling was marriage certificate

Ilikepinacoladass · 08/08/2022 18:48

Is he talking about the financial settlement? There are forms to fill out and documents needed for that (not ID / passports though as far as I'm aware)

gogohmm · 08/08/2022 19:56

Took me about 10 minutes online

gogohmm · 08/08/2022 19:58

The financials take a bit longer, about 20 minutes . Helps that it's all amicable

MooseBeTimeForSnow · 08/08/2022 20:01

I’m just wondering if his lawyer needs the proof of address and ID for anti-money laundering regulations?

Beachsidesunset · 08/08/2022 20:04

OP, what's wrong with you? Why on Earth do you want to be with someone who speaks to you so disrespectfully?

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