Help

[bbfudgey]

Me and my partner have split 3 weeks ago. We have 1 child together and I have 1 child from a previous relationship. We have a joint mortgage on the property we live in. He is the higher earner. I am the lower earner and the main care giver for the children. He is refusing to move out of the property he is difficult in many many way our relationship has been turbulent but I finally feel I have got to get out. He currently believes he can just buy me out of our 4 bedroom house and I have to go.

First of it is hell living like this I have been on the sofa for 3 weeks as he has taken to the bedroom which is great in sone ways as he's mostly out of the way. However I am the one still looking after children/house etc. He has gone through the angry stage and is now feeling he is on top of the world mocking me and being overly happy in front of me. I believe this will pass and the anger will return.

I am seeing a solicitor soon. Will I have to move out and find a new home or will he have to go? He is making me pay half the bills etc now even though he earns 3 x my wage. I work from home and he has told me he does not give mr permission to have people in the house. This means I can't earn as much money as usual.

I realise he has as much right as me to live in the house at the moment. He confronts me in front of our 10 year old son often.

Any help or anyone been in a similar situation. I could afford the house on my own as o could claim a little benefit and he would also have to pay maintenance (I think) but I can't do that whilst he is still here.

Have you had a mortgage review to confirm that you can afford it?

Have you discussed child arrangements?
Any maintaince will depend on that.

I have thd mortgage home call today. But also I can't claim any financial help until he moved out. Do catch 22. If I can't afford it what the solution as rent is triple the mortgage payments.

He won't 'discuss' anything I understand how maintain works but again until he moved out I can't claim for it

The property is jointly owned and you aren’t married. That means whatever happens you will only get 50% of the equity.

The bottom line is that you are not both going to live in it together forever. It will either have to be sold or one of you buys the other out. Fighting over the outcome is going to be expensive and mentally exhausting, for the children most of all. If you can afford to buy each other out then you can afford to buy new properties. Especially as you only need a 3 bed.

What is the attachment to the house? Why are you both arguing the toss? It only takes one of you to stop.

You will have to look into a possession order as he has as much right to be there as you.
If you do not pass affordability you could either look into a smaller mortgage or rent and claim UC.

You must feel like you are drowning now as you're in the thick of it. Just plan your immediate next step

That is not true depending on the living arrangements of the Childrrn and other factors the OP could receive a higher percentage

50/50 is only the starting point.
OP could also receive a portion or his pension and other assets

One of you will have to take the whole mortgage on and pay the other off, or you sell the house and both start over.

Either way will take a long time and there's no easy way if things are acrimonious.

If he were to pay you child maintenance for the child you have together could you afford to run the house on your own? Mortgage and all bills?

How much equity is there?

Surely you'd be better selling the house, splitting the equity, and finding a smaller home?

They are not married ( assuming partner so not dh?) so lemon is Correct
there cannot be claims in pensions or other assets owned by the other party

the house is jointly owned so the split us 50:50

If you jointly own the house, I don't see how you are going to just be given it. I'm not sure if that's what you expect? Surely if you can't agree on a settlement then you'll have to sell the house and both of you buy something smaller? Or he buys you out and you use the equity to buy a smaller property?

No I don't expect to be given the house! I would have to buy him out. I understand how the buy out works. Yes it's affordable once I can claim the entitlement I will get as a single person & maintenance (currently I can't do that but he is making me pay half of all the bills even tho he earns 3 x my salary and has denied me permission to continue working from home)

Rented properties in my area are limited with monthly rentals being 2 or 3 times more than the mortgage payments. Yes I would have sone equity from thd house sale but that won't last long if it's paying rent.

Ultimately I have to keep a roof over our daughters head and also my sons.

Would you be able to get a mortgage in your name on your salary alone?

I don't think mortgage companies include benefits in their calculations for affordability.

What do you mean he has denied you permission? You don't need his permission

He says if I have anyone in the house to do a treatment he will take the door of and blast music at us as loudly as possible. I know my law he probably doesn't have the right to say that but I can't risk putting my clients in that position.

If he gets aggressive with you or threatens you you can call the police and have him removed.

Have you got anyone that could act as a mortgage guarantor, like a parent or family member? You could then get a mortgage that you know would be covered by your job/maintenance/benefits and move straight from your current house without having to rent and use up your equity. If he's threatening you, you may have grounds to make him move out until the sale goes through. I wouldn't move out yourself though as he may make it difficult for the house to be sold.

Why don’t you just accept his offer to buy you out. Then buy a place of your own. If you can afford the 4 bed on your own why not a smaller place.

I guarantee of you lose interest in keeping the house so will he.

You are aware you cannot claim for a mortgage.

I too think you would be better letting him buy you out, then buy a smaller place. I doubt you would be able to get a mortgage on a 4 bed alone. You may be able to physically afford payments, but the affordability test isn't tested like that.

Get the equity you are owed and look for a smaller 3 bed you can pass the affordability on. And let him have the house.