Ex-husband introduced his "friend" without telling me

[PepsiMama]

Let me start by saying that I don't care what ex does on his own time. That's his business.

The problem I have is that he brought her over without warning anyone and then let her stay over. On top of that, he had our 6 year old son share a room with her 2 year old daughter.

We have been separated for 10 months and just got the divorce decree last week.

I casually asked about who this person was spending the night with our son present and he refused to answer any questions. He also said that they were "just friends", but our 6 year old caught them sharing a bed together.

I told him I was uncomfortable with the entire situation.

Do I have a right to be upset about this? I feel like an introduction is one thing, but making the children share a room and having a sleep over hours after meeting is too much. Especially if they are "just friends".

You can be upset but in reality there's nothing you can do; just as there's nothing he could do if you introduced a new partner to your DC. I'd say your piece, explain why you're disappointed and move on. He will no doubt badge you as thwarted unhinged ex wife otherwise

You have to accept that your ex may introduce new people even if it is in a clumsy way.

He doesn't have any duty to discuss new relationships with you but he could have perhaps arranged some casually meetings with his new friend and child such as over the park etc first but perhaps she doesn't live near him so that's why the first introduction was her and child staying overnight?

It's a pick your battles situation sadly

However if it becomes a regular occurrence you can ask that your son has a place of his own to sleep in I can't imagine it will be nice sharing long term

I'm afraid you need to let it go. My kids sleep on the floor next to their dad and gf. For a number of different reasons a safe guarding was raised but the sleeping arrangements weren't a concern.

Just let you Ds know he can talk things through with you anytime and you will listen to him.

I guess I should add that the other concern I have is prostitutes. That's part of the reason we divorced. I found text messages where he hired an escort and met her at a hotel. There were also countless searches for "happy ending" massage parlors while he was "on a business trip". I just hope she isn't some escort he brought to the house.

I would very much hope a sex worker wouldn't have a 2y/o in tow whilst on a job as it were.

If he's that way inclined perhaps a regular girlfriend is a better prospect. Either way I'm afraid there isn't much you can do except raise a safeguarding concern which is unlikely to get you very far (I doubt he'd admit to using sex workers) but would cause an awful lot of damage to whatever relationship you gave as parents.

If, hand on heart, you genuinely believe there to be a risk to your child's well-being then you can deny access but make sure you have irrefutable evidence before you do so