What does every other weekend mean to you?

[iloveitalia]

My husband and I are in the process of splitting up and organising contact for our 10 year old daughter. What does every other weekend mean to you?

Is it from Fri eve until the same time on Sunday eve? Or is it from Fri eve until drop off at school on Monday?

Thanks for your answers.

We balanced it differently, ExH has him Sat early evening through to after school Tuesday every week. That means we both get some weekend and both get some school run/regular weekday parenting

Don't rule out Monday morning drop off because you will miss her. If her father has to get her to school on Monday he is responsible for clean school clothes, pack up, homework, early night etc. Her coming home late on a Sunday sounds good but reality can be different

@OverTheRubicon

Is the other parent also doing a weekday night? Eg every Wednesday and eow? Unless there is risk involved, it's good for younger kids especially to have more frequent contact, and much as it can be so hard to be apart, it can be very good for the kids to have their fathers be involved with more of the day to day parts of getting ready for school and signing reading books. It can also be agreed that the 'morning' parent is responsible for care on their days if children are on holiday or ill, which is hugely helpful financially as it makes it easier to hold down a decent job, as well as save on some of the most expensive childcare.

You see so many single mothers absolutely skint, or introducing boyfriends to their kids far too early, and the underlying issue is generally that they're responsible for all or most of the finances and childcare. The issue is very often men who won't either care for or pay for their own kids, but also sometimes mothers who fought hard for eow when separating because they knew they'd miss the kids - but then get financially and romantically stuck because they're now responsible for pick ups, drop offs, all uniform, wraparound and holiday childcare, extra curriculars, doctor's appointments, sick kid collection etc. Meanwhile the ex is cruising tinder, able to get to work on time, renting a smaller and cheaper flat and paying a paltry CMS account that would barely cover the kids' uniform and shoes, let alone the extra space you need in the house or the food bill.

So anyway - just a major warning about trying to minimise nights with their other parent, assuming that parent is safe and caring.

This is spot on