Devastated

[Nessa55]

My husband of 16yrs left me last weekend while I was away visiting family he told me by text .He's refusing to talk to me face to face even though we work in the same place...He said he's not in love and our marriage has run it's course. I'm devastated.

Well, at the very least he's a coward. I'm sorry.

@Nessa55 you have my sympathy - I was on the receiving end of the same news after 20 years. Trust me, it's shitty but it does get (a bit) better....legally divorced 2020 but now facing reality of selling and downsizing from family home as part of settlement.

Oh hugs .. handhold.. and more hugs..

What a gutless shitweasel. 16 years of marriage and he didn't have the human decency to tell you to your face.

I know it doesn't feel like it, but once the shock and grief have passed you'll be able to build a happier life, without a selfish spineless manchild dragging you down. I'm so sorry, you must be reeling

I’m so sorry op. Sounds like his head has been turned by an OW and he doesn’t have the guts to say anything. Been there - it’s shit. He can’t refuse to talk forever, as you will need to discuss things at some point. I hope you have friends and/or family IRL - get some support around you.

Sorry op

Take one day at a time minute by minute
Do you have children?
Do simple things - eat, hydrate, take a walk, sleep.
You don’t have to do anything now re divorce or even talk to him
Take some time

Can’t believe he told you by text! Gutless.

The only thing I think you should do urgently is look at your finances. He has shown you that he is callous and deceitful. He may empty joint accounts or stop paying bills. You should probably get advice from your bank wrt joint accounts.
You will find lots of good advice on the relationships board.

@Nessa55

My husband of 16yrs left me last weekend while I was away visiting family he told me by text .He's refusing to talk to me face to face even though we work in the same place...He said he's not in love and our marriage has run it's course. I'm devastated.

If your husband is the kind of coward who ends a 16 year relationship by text message then whilst you feel devastated now, this is probably an opportunity of a lifetime for you to be with someone who isn't a prick.

Cherchez la femme

Did you have no idea something was wrong?

@ClariceQuiff

Cherchez la femme

Definitely.

This man is like a prawn;a spineless shithead.

I'm sorry.

And I agree with others, there's someone else.

Secure your accounts, change your locks, and get a good solicitor.

Im so sorry to hear that sending lots of hugs

I suppose I should be thankful it wasn't by text, but yes got the same statement after 20 years.

The good news is I met someone better and you will too!

Oh OP, this happened to me, albeit it 15 years and an email.

It's hard, so very hard but you will get through this. Don't continue to ask - you won't get the answers you deserve (until the OW pops up).

Seek advice, get finances sorted.

Wish you well.

You are in my prayers. Obtain advice, and discuss finances as well. You can do this.