What do you do about shared custody and dinners?!

[ColdToTheBones]

I was just wondering whether anyone ever tried to somehow work together with an ex so children don't have the same dinner twice in a row in the other parent's house? We all eat so much the same stuff I can see that happening a LOT! Or is it a case of shrug and oh well, that's life now.

No worries with my ex here, without fail he'll just give them either takeaway pizza, MacDonald's or a pasta microwave ready meal I tend to find he won't even think of stuff I'd do like chilli, sausages, vegetables, etc. they just don't even occur to him. Particularly as it's only ever weekends he sees the dc, he uses that as an excuse for them to have 'treat' food. If he was a more hand on dad I'd probably try to give him a heads up if say they'd already had chicken twice that week or whatever, but doesn't matter for us.

I sometimes text mine to find out what they’ve had! Although usually I just buy things for a couple of meals I know they will like. Then if they really didn’t fancy it I would give them something from the freezer.

How old are the kids?

When SDs are coming here I usually text them with two to three options.

Often they'll say something like: "can we not have Spag Bol as we had that at mum's this week". Or "we've had a lot of pasta so can we have something with rice". Or: "we had a huge lunch can we have something light" or whatever.

I don't normally give them free reign to choose anything they want as that would be a nightmare shopping (and probably health)-wise. But give them a few options based on what we've got in.

We don't involve mum as she's high conflict, and the kids are perfectly capable of saying what they do (or don't) fancy. Also I think neither household would be happy if the other tried to dictate meals.

Sometimes they just get what they're given if it's a last minute arrangement and a scramble.

they always seem happy and have never mentioned it's the second time that week - though I'm sure the law of averages means it must have happened occasionally.

I don't worry about it because if their dad gives them any vegetables rather than beige food it would be a bonus to their nutrition.

They eat cheap there....think pasta or jacket potatoes. I try to avoids those knowing they will have eaten them at dads.
The kids soon tell you!

As long as I give McDonald's, pizza, ready meals and fish and chips a swerve then we don't cross over. It is annoying that I can't be the one to offer those quick teas sometimes but I focus on giving them nutritious and tasty meals. I also always have stock options in the cupboard (soup, scrambled eggs, packets of microwave rice) that kind of thing that I can turn around quickly if they have had pasta the night before, for example.