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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Original poster

What, if any, rights does she have to kick him out?

13 replies

MsMarch · 19/01/2022 11:14

Friend attempting to go through separation from her soon-to-be-ex P (not married). They live together, two DDs. Throughout relationship, she has been main breadwinner (separate finances, but he would give her between £200-£400 per month as his share of expenses. A drop in the bucket) and except when DDs were quite small, she's also done the vast bulk of childcare, organising etc (when they were tiny he reduced his hours at work as he earns minimum wage and did 2 days of childcare - they were in nursery the rest of the time). They rent and it's a shared lease.

He's not working (sick leave) and not doing any additional childcare etc. Paying her £250 per month. But he refuses to leave and as he's on the lease she doesn't think she can kick him out. Rent, bills etc are ALL paid from her personal account though. Does she have any legal right to toss him? Or is the only option that they have to jointly cancel the lease and she moves somewhere else?

OP posts:
TheDuchessOfBeddington · 19/01/2022 12:03

It’s going to be legally difficult or perhaps impossible. A friend of mine got her boyfriend off the lease when he was arrested for domestic violence and assaulting a police office. The landlord changed the locks on him to protect her but tbh I don’t know if that was completely legal.

Technically the landlord needs to end that tenancy and start a new one with only her on it. I’m assuming from what you say she can easily afford the rent herself.

I wouldn’t think it a good idea for her to leave as it sounds like he could easily default on the rent if he only pays £400 per month.

The whole situation sounds like a nightmare. IMO her best bet is to continue to pressure him to leave. Are the any sympathetic family members that could talk some sense into him?

Original poster
MsMarch · 19/01/2022 12:22

If the tenancy hasn't come to an end, can she ask the landlord to cancel their joint tenancy and change it to her name only? Or can she only do that at the end of the lease? They've still got another 7 months I think - they moved in over the summer 2 years ago.

OP posts:
Crumbs22 · 19/01/2022 13:04

@MsMarch

If the tenancy hasn't come to an end, can she ask the landlord to cancel their joint tenancy and change it to her name only? Or can she only do that at the end of the lease? They've still got another 7 months I think - they moved in over the summer 2 years ago.
The Landlord can't just cancel the tenancy, it has to either come to the end of the fixed term or the tenants/Landlord gives the correct notice as per the tenancy agreement. If he used an agent to give the tenancy agreement then it also depends on what their contract says when tenants want to end a tenancy etc. Even if a new tenancy was drafted with just her name for her to stay on, the deposit may have to be returned then repaid and that's if she is in control of it and he had no share but it's assumed they share the amount equally. It can be complicated.
Original poster
MsMarch · 19/01/2022 13:18

If he was a normal person, he'd just agree to go, and they'd jointly go to the landlord and change the tenancy to just her name (hollow laugh that he may have paid part of the deposit - that's definitely not a complication in this case as he's never paid a penny for anything in his life).

I think that not only is she going to be stuck with him until the tenancy is up, but she will have to continue to pay. It's mind boggling. But also not - he has never stepped up before so not sure why he'd do so now that she's finally ended the relationship.

OP posts:
Original poster
MsMarch · 19/01/2022 13:19

One last question - what if she starts only paying half the rent on the assumption that he's responsible for the other half? That won't work, will it? The landlord would consider them equally in breech?

OP posts:
Crumbs22 · 19/01/2022 13:25

@MsMarch

One last question - what if she starts only paying half the rent on the assumption that he's responsible for the other half? That won't work, will it? The landlord would consider them equally in breech?
As long as the whole rent is paid then that's all any Landlord expects because that's what the Tenancy states so yes they would both be in breech if she only pays part of the rent.
Original poster
MsMarch · 19/01/2022 14:24

There was a thread on here recently about when you had an "I told you so" moment. This is mine, unfortunately, and I take no joy in it whatsoever. I knew he was bad news, not quite from the very beginning, but from shortly before they moved in together. Sigh.

I keep inviting her and the DD over to ours or to do stuff with us, so they get some relief from him. I guess that's all I can do for now. And I can help them move in the summer....

OP posts:
millymolls · 19/01/2022 17:44

The one thing I don’t see here is where is he going to live and what is the plan for him in regards the children?
Ultimately his living arrangements are not her problem but they are when they gave joint children who need a secure relationship with both parents

Original poster
MsMarch · 20/01/2022 09:54

@millymolls

The one thing I don’t see here is where is he going to live and what is the plan for him in regards the children? Ultimately his living arrangements are not her problem but they are when they gave joint children who need a secure relationship with both parents
Why is that her problem? yes, he would struggle financially if she wasn't funding him, but he can and should get benefits and it's really not her problem. As for stable relationship with both parents... well, I suspect that ship has sailed. He won't even take the DDs to their activities currently, so it seems pretty unlikely he's going to be stepping up to have them EOW.
OP posts:
millymolls · 20/01/2022 12:45

My point is when you have children together you have. Responsibility to co parent and put your children first
I did say ultimately it’s not her problem but he is her childrens dad and everything mentioned here is just about her wishes, no mention of the children and how the split impacts them - which should be at the forefront of it

Original poster
MsMarch · 20/01/2022 12:57

@millymolls

My point is when you have children together you have. Responsibility to co parent and put your children first I did say ultimately it’s not her problem but he is her childrens dad and everything mentioned here is just about her wishes, no mention of the children and how the split impacts them - which should be at the forefront of it
Fair enough. Except I was just asking about the lease. Obviously, I have all kinds of thoughts on their relationship, in particular his behaviour etc, but I don't really feel that's my place to comment on.

What it comes down to is that he is living in a house that she pays for, the relationship is over, he's not exactly engaged with the DDs and she wants to move on. In the perfect world, when he moves out, of course he'll have a good relationship with his daughters. But I don't think she has to live with him forever because it's easier for him than for him to move out?

OP posts:
Whatonearth07957 · 20/01/2022 19:47

She needs to talk to landlord. End lease according to terms and re-sign in her own name. Landlord will go with her as higher earner. Otherwise look locally for another rental and again leave him to sort himself out separately.

Ovenaffray · 20/01/2022 20:01

If his name is on the tenancy she can’t just kick him out I don’t think

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