Can I have some advice regarding divorce please?

[Livinginfaith]

Hi I have recently separated and my H has an alcohol problem. He moved out recently and is now coming back to our joint owned home. He wants us to sell and split the equity and I don’t want to. I would prefer to stay here with the kids till they’re 18 and he could rent till then. I am seeking advice from a solicitor but I’d like to know what likely outcomes there would be in court? He’s adamant that he’s never drinking again and he’ll now be the perfect dad. I don’t know whether he will manage this but if he does, would that mean he could likely get 50/50 and make us sell? Any experience would be gratefully received. Thanks.

Impossible and reckless to answer as so much detail required

Rather than speculate
Just make getting to a solicitor a top priority.
As in Monday next week

You need to take advice from a solicitor. Get details of how much is the in bank account, what savings you have, how much mortgage there is, what pensions you have etc, etc so that you can go fully prepared. My experience of alcoholics is that you cannot trust their promises as their need for the bottle is far greater than their need for anything else. If you see a solicitor at least you can work out what is possible and plan accordingly.

Thanks both. I agree regarding the alcoholism. I will sort all the financials. I guess I was really asking if the courts still do favour the mum generally. We are fairly even in salary, even in pension and nothing saved. This question is more about peoples experience of what courts usually favour.

the courts will favour what is in the children's best interests.
not either parent, the children.

Thanks, yes I have read a lot of threads and understand the process as best I can until my first meeting. I think I was just looking for anything to hold on to in terms of people who’ve been there. I’ve done everything for the kids always. His drinking was major. Possibly still is and facing him being here is worrying. I just can’t find anything about the outcome of divorcing an alcoholic, especially if they’re being good while the divorce happens although yet to see if he can.

I believe that you both need to be able to house the children comfortably, so I think you’ll need to sell or buy him out.

As others say its really difficult to say

But, generally speaking, clean breaks are preferred by courts. And staying in the home, unless you can afford to buy him out isn't a given.

His drinking may or may not change anything. By the time you get there he could be or claim to be sober.

Alot depends on earnings of each person and pensions etc. 50:50 is the starting point.

Its so very difficult to give any advice that could be construed as 'likey'.

Ok thanks everyone for your time. I’ll see what the solicitor says and hope we get though it as best as possible.

Really depends
If children are young in general less likely to support this as it ties you together a long time and ge gas yo wait to get his share
Also depends if house is considered too big for needs

But will depend on earnings, ages, overall share of assets etc
Courts don’t favour mum, but do put the needs of children ( housing them is key)at the top which can sometimes we feel like favouring mum