Leaving but pressure to have sex

[lovelybones1]

So I've posted before about me leaving I have made the right steps to start getting the ball rolling, I have been told by woman's aid to try and act normal when he's wanting to hold my hand constantly to not put myself at risk but now he keeps mentioning sex... he said yesterday that he could barely walk because of his "blue balls" and it being so painful obviously trying to make me feel bad into doing it and I just can't bring myself to do it but I don't want to jeopardise my leaving plan ... I have also been put at medium risk with woman's aid and they suggested trying to go to a refuge but as I'm not high risk and he's not physically abusive I didn't think I would be eligible I also have 3 children so I wasn't sure if they would deal well with the mess up.

Sorry to be crude, but if he's that desperate he can go in the bathroom with a box of tissues. He has no respect for you, otherwise he wouldn't keep pestering you. Hope this strengthens your resolve to leave, my ex was the same, just thinking of himself. Good luck.

Can you develop a long-running UTI or thrush?

Good luck OP, well done for getting the ball rolling. 💐

Yes I did say you can sort yourself out and he just said well I'd rather do stuff with you, yes I feel so disrespected and pressured into it so I'm even more uncomfortable than I was before

Tell him you have thrush and he can catch it from you (which would be true in that situation).

He sounds vile.

My parents are in the middle of separating after being together since kids and that's really effected me too but it feels like it's non existent anymore as it was a few days ago, I can't wait for tomorrow so I can speak to woman's aid again he's making my skin crawl

I agree with mentioning thrush.
That's the only way I could rid my ex partner of pestering me.
May I add - thank you for contacting women's aid. They were fantastic for me and my child at the time

Tell him your on your period and heavy.

Told him I've started my period and he just said that's annoying I proper wanted it yesterday.. can't cope

You would be eligible for a refuge
However yes it would be a huge upheaval, but if the alternative is being sexually coerced in your home you have to consider it

I did contact them last night but I have to cal them to discuss it properly only problem is I don't get any time away from him unless I'm at a school meeting or volunteering both times I can't really be on my phone :(

Can you make up a medical emergency? Visitors and people accompanying you can’t go at the moment due to Covid so it’s a good excuse - just say you’ve got huge period clots / chest pains etc, something urgent and disappear for a while. Make some phone calls and then go back if you have to and say they discharged you etc.

I could but then I'd have to leave my 3 DC with him I wouldn't feel comfortable doing that, I do have an appointment with school safeguarding at 8am that he's not going to so I can do it tomorrow I will just have to keep the lie up about period x

Once I have been to the school meeting I can call the 24hr number and speak as long as he doesn't meet me at school