Does anyone have any advice. I am going through a high conflict divorce with my husband of over 23 yrs. We are nearly at the end of it, but its been torturous being stuck in the same house during lockdown. My two boys have also been stuck in a high conflict environment and its affected all of us. Anger, resentment are simmering all the time.
My oldest boy is a bit like my husband (his way or the high way). He is always laying down the law with my youngest.
My oldest boy has always been the pawn of my mother in law. She has always liked to pull strings in my house despite not having stepped inside it for 10 years. She has been whispering in my son's ears how awful I am and how I did certain things many years ago. Its all a complete lie and incredibly gossipy. But she's basically driven a wedge between me and my son for no reason. So when my oldest pulls rank he uses the MIL as a tool to spread fear. So my youngest fears he will be ostracised by that side of the family if my oldest tells them stories.
My oldest can also be really rude, cruel to me. Its incredibly hard to tell him when he's out of order because he will just run to the MIL. My husband also gets involved and does lots of manipulations behind the scenes. He is of course now very much backed up by the MIL, even though he stopped talking to the MIL for 4 years.
I feel that they are both (husband and MIL) trying to create conflict in my environment, between my children and between me and my children, so that even when I come through this divorce, my children view my home as more conflict than theirs, even though its my MIL that has caused the conflict from day one. She is not educated but is very pushy and has a great skill for making other people appear to be sub standard.
Does anyone have any advice on how to handle all of this.