Getting ex out of house if not cooperating

[payingforhouse]

I have been granted my decree absolute 2 months ago and I have moved out of the family home to my parents' house with my two children.

My ex husband is still in the family home. He works minimum wage and I guess he is earning about £600/month. He has no qualifications and I am quite highly qualified and a relatively high earner. In addition I think he is only working 2 or 3 days per week on a zero hours contract.

My mortgage is £1200/month. The house is in my sole name and I am paying the mortgage. Clearly him taking on the mortgage is out of the question - no mortgage provider would accept him.

I am desperate to stop financing my ex's life, especially since I am doing the majority of the childcare.

My ex has no solicitor.

I just want to sell the house and give him whatever I want to give him ASAP and get him out of my life.

What can he do to obstruct this? Can he ultimately refuse to leave and be evicted?

My solicitor has written to him asking for his earnings and Form E and informing him that I will not pay the gas/electric/internet any more, and he has not replied. How much can a person delay the process by not cooperating?

I am due a meeting with my solicitor next week and I am keen to get the house on the market ASAP. Has anybody got experience with an uncooperative person? Clearly it is in his interests not to cooperate because he is living for free in a house that I'm paying for, and he would never afford this standard of living on his own. What steps can we take if he continues not to engage? Will it boil down to the same process as a landlord evicting a nonpaying tenant?

What if he claims that he can fill the house with lodgers and meet the mortgage payments that way (maybe somehow reimbursing me)? Can he do that and somehow manage to stay on in the house?

What does your financial order say? as a marital asset it sounds like you will need a court ordered financial settlement that orders the house to be sold and the proceeds split. Then you can enforce it.

But you have the children so you will always have preference over him.

As it's in your name get the locks changed while you're about it.

Why did you apply for the absolute before finances were agreed?

I haven't got a financial order yet. I applied for the absolute before sorting finances as the solicitor said that normally the cutoff is the date of the absolute, and I wanted to protect any money I earn during the divorce process.

The thing I'm worried about is that the equity of the house is £70k, and I have some other assets totalling another £70k. All this money comes from my hard work - not a single penny was contributed by my ex husband. Is there any scenario where he comes out of the marriage with a free house to live in?

My ex is very irresponsible with money and I wanted to be legally divorced ASAP before he did something stupid like taking out a payday loan, and the finances take time to sort out.

the outstanding mortgage is £360k... so there is not much equity in the house. As far as I understand it, I have a right to a clean break... so does that mean I can force the house to be sold ASAP?

I understand your worry! Has your solicitor advised issuing a Form A so at least you've got something underway if he won't do things voluntarily?

@payingforhouse

I haven't got a financial order yet. I applied for the absolute before sorting finances as the solicitor said that normally the cutoff is the date of the absolute, and I wanted to protect any money I earn during the divorce process.

The thing I'm worried about is that the equity of the house is £70k, and I have some other assets totalling another £70k. All this money comes from my hard work - not a single penny was contributed by my ex husband. Is there any scenario where he comes out of the marriage with a free house to live in?

I’ve got to say that normally these threads make it clear that marital assets should be split, and that includes your pension, so you should expect to give him a fair chunk of the assets. Maybe not half given you’ll have kids, but a share.

It doesn’t matter if the money came from your hard work, it’s all joint

Thanks. I didn't know about the Form A. Will ask about it next week.

How soon can I expect to stop subsidising his life in any way? Will the solicitors/courts look at the finances and say that I need to keep paying the mortgage, or will it be quite straightforward to put the house up for sale?

Also, what's the best I can hope for in terms of an asset split? 60% of my net worth? There are 2 children and we were married for 8 years.

Really surprised that your solicitor advised you to do the absolute before the finances. Usually that's not what's advised. I'm also extremely surprised that they didn't advise you to stay put in the house rather than moving out.

Anyway. Leaving that aside for one moment - there are a few important questions / things to consider.

1. how long was the marriage? That will have a big income.
2. What have you decided re. the children and access - is there a court order supporting this.
3. You say you earn more - how much more? This will impact various things including how much of the house equity you get and whether you have to pay your ex spousal maintenance.
4. Why is your Ex's income so low? Is it because he was raising the kids eg SAHD? Is it due to disability or inability to work?

TBH - it sounds tricky, and might have to prepare yourself to swallow some really unpalatable financial decisions.

Starting point is 50/50 on all assets (inc savings, investments, pensions and house).

Next is needs. If you have the children the majority of the time, you might be able to claim slightly higher needs which could swing things a bit in your favour.

HOWEVER, the fact that you have higher income and higher mortgage raising capability leaves you with a big problem. Courts will expect that both parties are able to house adequately. And that includes him being able to have a home that has enough bedrooms for the kids.

To me, that suggests he'd get a bigger share of the pot and might have a case for spousal maintenance against you.

That said, courts will expect him to maximise his income and support himself. If he can work more but chooses not to - that will be taken into consideration.

If you give the answers above - can probably give more of a sense. But if you have a good lawyer they should also be able to be more concrete.

One final thing. You won't be able to evict him like a landlord, it's a marital asset and his home. You also CANNOT change the locks as PP suggested. You'll get in trouble. If the court orders the property to be sold and split, they'll put timings in place. As to whether someone can frustrate the process by being difficult- yes but you will get there eventually.

Thanks. My earnings are about £60k.

There is no court order regarding the children but they go to primary school next to my parents' house which is quite far from the family home. So in practice they are with me 80% of the time and it would be hard for him to overturn it.

There is no reason on paper why he is earning so little. Without qualifications he will not be able to earn a huge amount but nothing should be stopping him working 40 hours which would give him about £20k/year. He was always reluctant to work and this was a problem throughout the marriage, and unfortunately looks like it will be my problem after the divorce too!

Since so far in the process he has not got a solicitor, I am wondering what will happen if my solicitor just applies unilaterally for the financial settlement offering him 40%? Would that go through or be likely to be rejected?

Even if I have to give him a bigger share of the pot, is there any way that I can continue to be on the hook for the mortgage for the next few years?

Marriage was 8 years

I think you need to reign yourself back. If your solicitor has not advised you that you will be splitting assets then you need a new solicitor.

You won’t get to control this process or be able to demand an unfair split of assets just because you are the higher earner. Anything but and given the disparity in income his needs are much higher and that could result in at least 50% going his way.

As to payIng the mortgage, you can decide not to pay it. But then you both have defaults on a mortgage. That sound like less of a problem for a man who won’t be looking for credit any time soon. You might want to get a mortgage in the near future.

How old are the children and what was the situation when they were born/toddlers/preschoolers re childcare?

@payingforhouse

Thanks. My earnings are about £60k.

There is no court order regarding the children but they go to primary school next to my parents' house which is quite far from the family home. So in practice they are with me 80% of the time and it would be hard for him to overturn it.

There is no reason on paper why he is earning so little. Without qualifications he will not be able to earn a huge amount but nothing should be stopping him working 40 hours which would give him about £20k/year. He was always reluctant to work and this was a problem throughout the marriage, and unfortunately looks like it will be my problem after the divorce too!

Since so far in the process he has not got a solicitor, I am wondering what will happen if my solicitor just applies unilaterally for the financial settlement offering him 40%? Would that go through or be likely to be rejected?

Even if I have to give him a bigger share of the pot, is there any way that I can continue to be on the hook for the mortgage for the next few years?

So - length of marriage means you're unlikely to make a case for getting out what you put in.

That means you're starting from a 50/50 point.

If you think that he could earn £20k py. I don't think that's unreasonable. But that still puts you on three times his salary.

I would assume that the house needs to be sold. I think he could potentially make a case for keeping it if it was near the children, but since it's not and he can't afford the mortgage that seems likely to me.

I don't know what else is in the pot (savings / investments / pension). And I'm not sure what house prices near the kids are like.

But your mortgage capability (or rent capability) is clearly a lot higher than his. Even if we take his £20k potential into account, that puts him on say £80k mortgage compared to your £240k mortgage. (That's just done on a basic 4x salary calc when in fact things are more complex). Throw in the fact he'll owe you CM if you have the kids 80% of the time and his housing potential is even lower.

Here it massively makes a difference how much property prices are. If you can both house the kids equally ish for £100k, it's doable, but if a house is £250k then there's clearly not enough in the pot to house you both.

Also - the fact that you've moved the kids away from him and the family home makes things tricky. He could easily say he needs to house near you. He could also say he wants 50/50 and needs to be housed appropriately.

I'd honestly expect the liquid assets (house equity, savings etc) to swing in his favour. But without the detail of savings it's hard to say how much.

I don't think offering him 40% is a goer. Even if by some miracle he agreed I doubt a judge would sign off it since he's the lower earner so any departure away from inequality is likely to be in his favour (albeit tempered by some CM coming your way).

You could try offering him 50/50, and show that he could house appropriately on that. Possibly with you having slightly more pension and him having slightly more capital. How much is there in savings. If you could house him outright or with a tiny mortgage that would help.

You were married for 8 years, were you cohabiting before that? That would also have a potential impact if the actual relationship was longer.