Where to start

[jazzyh]

It's starting to look like a real possibility that me and my husband may be heading towards separation. We have a 2yo.
I just can't figure out how on earth i could get myself a separate house. We own our current house but would have to sell as neither could afford to keep up mortgage independently. I gave up my long term job and profession after my maternity leave and am in the process of starting a new business.
I wouldn't be in a position to get another mortgage as my finances don't feel stable enough and I'm not yet earning enough, but I'm also not sure whether I would be able to rent due to having no long term proof of income or references.
There would be equity in the house which I'd be happy to use for rent payments whilst I find my feet but as far as I'm aware most agents want evidence of long term earnings etc.
Has anyone been in a similar situation or could offer advice?
We have no family locally who could support us.

If you are limited on income and you have a child, look at the website turn2us - there is a calculator/tool on there that can help you work out what benefits you are entitled to. This may help give you an regular income if you are eligible for UC or other benefits (child tax credits) - this will likely change once you sell the house and have some equity (depending how much). Houses are seemingly selling quite quickly at the moment, so you probably won't be waiting too long for it to sell.
I know you said you have no family locally, but is moving in with them an option? Your STBX might not be too happy, but moving to where you have support might be better in the long run, especially if your business can be run there too. I'm regretting not going ahead with my first decision to move nearer my family as my STBX is now being difficult around contact, which I didn't envisage at the time. Do what is best and what works for you. X

Thank you for replying, I'll check out that website.
I don't think moving is an option really - different family members are in different parts of the country - the closest being a 2.5 drive away from where I am now.
Whilst things aren't working out in my relationship, he does have a good relationship with DD and I really don't want to make it difficult for him to see her. I also have my friendship support network where I am now...
Ill look at the info you suggested. Can anyone advise about the practicalities of getting a house when you don't have long term proof of income?

Anyone?

My ex was in a similar position, in that he had no long term proof of earning. In his case because he lost his job while we were in the process of divorcing. He got half the equity from the house.
He was able to rent by convincing one of his mates to be a guarantor, which is fairly standard (well not necessarily getting your mate to do it!) if you don't meet the financial prerequisites. Is that something a family member or friend would be willing to do? Or, if you had the money from the house, could you offer to pay X number of months up front which would possibly negate the need for the other bits.

Ah thanks @Tiddleypops hadn't thought of getting a guarantor. I'm pretty sure any of my close family would be happy and able to do that for me.
Re: paying a chunk up front I'm sure I remember a thread on here a while back where agents were still refusing this without proof of income. I think it's seen as a bit suspicious and there's no guarantee that you'll be earning at the end of the amount paid up front and so is still seen as risky?

Tbh, I would question whether starting your own business is the right thing to do in the middle of a divorce. Going back to your old career might be more practical until you have got back on your financial feet.

You haven’t separated yet never mind gotten to finance splitting discussions and divorce. That’s enough time to re-establish a career and show that you have a permanent job and regular income.

@LemonTT totally agree about it not being good timing.
Unfortunately I left my career over a year ago and it's in an area that requires professional registration which I have now let lapse, therefor I can't just walk back into it. It's also not a field that works well around family life and even less so without the back up of a partner so I'm not sure it would solve anything anyway.
Things haven't been great for a while but maybe naively I didn't think it would be heading in this direction so quickly ☹️ thankfully my new business is relatively low risk with very minimal overheads so I'm hoping it will continue picking up quite quickly

Then think about timescales. Two motivated people could get divorced in under a year with a fair wind and no pandemic.

If one of you wants to play for time, in a pandemic, it could take the best part of two years to get selling the house stage.

When the time comes to separate, try to have a constructive discussion about money that works for both of you. The equity will continue to build which is good for both of you, even if one of you moves out.

Nesting might be an option, if both of you agree. Which is where you keep the house for a while and rent a small place. You alternate stays there with one of you having time in the family home with the child.

Cynically it’s even better if one of you gets a new partner with a house.

Thanks @LemonTT, I'd never even heard or thought of nesting as a concept - certainly worth me looking into.
All really helpful info that I'll start considering. As the relationship hasn't completely broken down I'd presumed it wouldn't necessarily be too complex a situation but again looks like I'm maybe being naive...