Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

AIBU? Is this illegal?

31 replies

2021Hasgottabebetter · 13/07/2021 10:10

I am mid divorce with form E exchanged
STBX in marital home and I still have key and belongings there.
Went round the other day and STBX was out but has divorce papers all over the sofa.....obviously I had a good look!
I might have taken the odd photo of emails which reveal a bit of deceipt on the part of STBX.

I did not break in, still my house and I went in with my key.
Didn't take anything apart from a photo or 30

I think that this is legal but perhaps not ethical.

Views?
Can I use the information in court?

OP posts:
Proudmumtoday · 13/07/2021 10:12

May not be illegal but that’s stunningly immoral. Behave yourself.

Boonlark · 13/07/2021 10:15

That's stalker behaviour. And it could be considered harassment. Plus, I'm not sure on the legalities of taking photos of things bound by solicitor-client privilege

Proudmumtoday · 13/07/2021 10:16

Just thinking - illegal - computer misuse act?

Boonlark · 13/07/2021 10:16

How did you take photos of emails? Were they paper copies, or did you go onto their computer?

Boonlark · 13/07/2021 10:19

On second thoughts...yes, use it in court. Tell the judge how you got the information, I'm sure it will be very helpful to the decision making process

wobytide · 13/07/2021 10:28

Absolutely massive no-no and any solicitor will tell you the same

Hallyup6 · 13/07/2021 10:45

No wonder you're divorcing with behaviour like that. I think he's had a lucky escape.

ThisIsStartingToBoreMe · 13/07/2021 11:33

What sort of deceit? Are you saying that he has assets that weren't declared in his form e

vivainsomnia · 13/07/2021 12:03

You were perfectly entitled to go in the house. You were not entitled to go through his personal documents.

PicaK · 13/07/2021 12:19

Illegal

BelleClapper · 13/07/2021 12:20

I would be very very surprised if the OP is the wife.

He’s playing the pronoun game quite carefully.

Viviennemary · 13/07/2021 12:21

If a man did this the wife would be advised to call the police and have the locks changed. Good old MN double standards at work again.

BelleClapper · 13/07/2021 12:22

@Viviennemary

If a man did this the wife would be advised to call the police and have the locks changed. Good old MN double standards at work again.
I don’t see anyone agreeing with the OP Hmm
Viviennemary · 13/07/2021 12:23

Ok.

BelleClapper · 13/07/2021 12:24

And, as I suspected, a quick search reveals the Op is male.

starrynight87 · 13/07/2021 12:45

That is really bad behaviour.

ThisIsStartingToBoreMe · 13/07/2021 12:46

Male? Well my question remains, are you saying that she has assets that weren't declared on the form e?

RunningFromInsanity · 13/07/2021 13:03

Depends on a few things.

Why did you go round? To snoop or for a legitimate reason?
I think many of us who stumble across that sort of paperwork would have a little look tbh.

How big is the deceit. Is it important info for your divorce proceedings?

MadeForThis · 13/07/2021 13:08

If it was sitting out I wouldn't have been able to stop myself looking.

Emails feels a bit sneakier tho.

Depends on how deceitful and underhand he has been.

jennywasafriendofmrbrightside · 13/07/2021 13:08

@Hallyup6

No wonder you're divorcing with behaviour like that. I think he's had a lucky escape.
What led you to believe that the OP was male?
Choice4567 · 13/07/2021 13:12
Hmm
adiudicium · 13/07/2021 13:33

Yep, I picked up the "missing" pronouns straight away too......

"I did not break in, still my house and I went in with my key."
I've been on the receiving end of similar behaviour and it can be very distressing.
The key question is did you have prior agreement to enter the property on this occasion and was agreement made that you could go in without STBX being present? If you no longer live there a solicitor would advise that you should obtain prior agreement, even if to collect your own possessions. STBX still in FMH has a right to the peaceful enjoyment of their home, so entering without agreement or permission once you have moved out is not on. If you did not have prior agreement (and that I doubt, given that relevant paperwork was left out) and your STBX found out you had been in without agreement and advised their solicitor of this, then anything you found out could be dismissed from the case and would not then be taken into account in the settlement. You may suspect there is some deception going on, but equally you cannot use deception in order to discover it.

MagicalCreatures · 17/07/2021 14:14

My ex husband logged into my emails after I seperates him and left the family home.
Took a screenshot of a personal letter to a new partner I'd started seeing and sent it to his entire phone book accusing me off having an affair (which I hadn't)
I reported it to the police.
He has also been opening my bank statements in my name only without my permission, the ones that still went to our marital home before I changed my address, which I can prove he did and I reported this to the police also.

They couldn't have cared less. Said that there was a line they really had to cross for it to be considered a problem.
We are married so apparently he could worm his way out of it somehow.

I was convinced I could get him arrested for it. But nope

PennyDreadful66 · 17/07/2021 14:16

I'm pretty sure if the house is in joint names then op has every right to enter the property.

PennyDreadful66 · 17/07/2021 14:18

@PennyDreadful66

I'm pretty sure if the house is in joint names then op has every right to enter the property.
Reading her ex partners emails, no right to but definitely legal to enter the property.
Swipe left for the next trending thread