Hey all.
Looking to hear how separated parents make it work. To give a bit of a back story, I ended my relationship about 3 months ago. My ex was emotionally abusive towards me and when I started seeing it happen with our DD I sought help. I'm still attending counselling to get through it all and keep the control which I had lost for 8 years.
My ex had been staying with friends and jumping back and forth a lot and on his terms. Today I spoke to him and suggested he moves out properly. I'll pay the mortgage and he can afford to rent.
He asked how it'd work with money so I explained we would get it in writing with the solicitors and that with my slight raise at work and child support I could afford to do it.
He was in full agreement. That is until he spoke to his mum. He now (after 3 months) has decided he wants our DD half a week. So 50/50 custody. In the 3 months we've been separated he's not said anything about how much or how often he wants to see our DD. Only told me what I can and cannot do. Financially and otherwise.
Because of the emotional abuse I am not comfortable with him having 50% of the time with our DD. And I find it surprising that he suggests this after I mention child support. I don't want him to not be in our DD's life because on the good days they're really good and she loves him so much. I feel like I'm fighting to might it all work. But for him and I don't know how to make it work for me.
I am having serious anxiety about this all now. I'm trying my best to work this out between the two of us to make things easier and happier further down the line. But in all honesty I am exhausted now.
Would love to hear other people's arrangements and how it works for you all. I don't know anyone who is separated. So I'm reaching out to you lovely lot!