Hello all,
Is there anyone out there who was quiet as a young girl and avoided boys/men like the plague (shy) and ended up marrying the wrong man in the end? I put way too much effort into my career to escape living on a council estate with my mother so didn’t experience the opposite sex - hardly at all! Well, to be frank, I didn’t - at all!! Boys maybe thought I was nerdy. I was never interested back then!
I met my husband during my university years (who was a driver for the university) and we got chatting. Got on well and we started going out. He took me places that I’d never been to (growing up in a low income home we didn’t go anywhere) and I relished in it but I always knew there was ‘something missing’. I was a virgin and hadn’t experienced anyone else. I had nothing to compare him to.
Roll on 27 years and I am in an empty marriage. I am not attracted to him and gave up with sex years ago as, well, he never turned me on and was so bad (although I had nothing to compare it to) at it - no kissing much, no foreplay and just on and off kinda guy. I am very passionate inside. Crave what I see on TV sometimes. He’s very odd. 11 year age gap doesn’t help. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings but have done myself immense damage over the years.
I have blossomed over the years in my career and my looks. I am 50 next year and don’t look it. I’m a lot more confident now (I’m also a senior manager in my profession) and feel very different to the young girl I was back then. I was a fool! A bloody fool!
I ended it last Christmas as I could no longer take living in a fake marriage. I have matured over the years and realised what I have done. Not sure on my next step as I am still living in our house but have to sell up. I’ve decided to go to New York once this virus settles a bit and have a holiday there. Need it!
Anyone else been in my position? What did u do?