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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Please help...arguement, home life becoming unbearable

7 replies

Googleboxfan · 10/07/2021 13:47

Bit of background- Wife wants to separate but is still living in same house. I am also female.

One of many arguements, Bought new tooth brush for DD. Wife me Told not to give her it as dd has just started using other toothbrush which the bristles look like they need replacing. I said well she might like using this one. Told again not to give her it. Was told I was creating an argument yet again. Said I wasn't the one arguing and that I had only bought new toothbrush.
Was told I am creating an issue/arguement and instead of just saying 'OK' I am the one eith the issue.
Went upstairs said if dd doesn't use other toothbrush then she can use this new one.

Told to duck off. Told to move out. I told her she wants to split she can leave.

She then recounted the arguement and it was totally different to what I had actually said. She is making me question myself.
Told her I don't like where this is going and I am starting to feel uncomfortable with this all.

She just blames me for everything has taken money out of our joint savings and had organised for her salary to go into her own account.

Feel like this has become abbusive now - I don't know what to do. I only work part time as we had agreed I would be homemaker. I have no money for a solicitor etc.

OP posts:
Googleboxfan · 10/07/2021 13:50

I am just finding living with her unbearable. I have been advised by a solicitor for me not to.move out of house and to stay with daughter.
She has also started accusing me of spending her dad's cash which he gave us we had stored at home and before I spent any I always asked her if I could take X amount from her. She's accusing me of spending almost all of it. I really think she has lost the plot but making me question my own sanity

I don't know what I can do

OP posts:
Googleboxfan · 10/07/2021 13:56

Over the past few weeks, she has also 'forgotten' to take the key out of the inside of the lock on our front door. I always come home for lunch when working and 4 times in 2 weeks I've been unable to access my house. I ring her then she answers eventually. I can't access back door as we always leave key in patio door.
I've asked her if she can try not to leave key in door either.

Where do I stand if she continues doing this?

OP posts:
Googleboxfan · 10/07/2021 13:59

I am so miserable, scared and anxious with all this. I've thought about leaving and taking dd but she is adopted and already has experienced alot of change in her little life

OP posts:
Googleboxfan · 10/07/2021 14:01

For the record before I get verbally bashed on here...we don't argue in front of dd. Although I am undermined by ex wife all the time and it's making me miserable

OP posts:
millymollymoomoo · 10/07/2021 16:08

The only thing you can really do is file for divorce and ask for a financial order

Plus you’ll need to think about full time work and child arrangement order if you can’t reach agreement

HighlandCowbag · 10/07/2021 16:15

You have posted so many times about your situation. You have been told to get legal advice and told to go to Womans Aid. The advice won't change. Its a really difficult situation for you I know. But no one can give you any different advice because you need to go down the legal route.

FutureExH · 11/07/2021 01:28

@Googleboxfan

I don't think this is the best place to get advice because it's impossible for us to understand the full situation. The solicitor you have spoken to tells you not to leave the marital home and if it's just petty squabbles your wife is starting then sure, that's sound advice. However, if this behaviour is erratic to the point that you are in danger, then no court will think it unreasonable that you got out with DD.

Perhaps there is someone at your DDs school who you could talk to?

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