My child's father has abandoned our unborn baby

[CorneliaaSt]

I have a 5 year old already. His excuse? I won't allow 50/50 custody and he wants nothing to do with the baby unless I agree to that. I won't let my newborn out of my care for 4 days a week. I intend to breastfeed. He has option to come see the baby whenever he likes. He said no. I'm not even out of the first trimester.

I broke up with him for good reasons - he was always a victim, even through this he's made it about how he "can't be a weekend dad, so has to walk away but he's feeling so low" and he would "want to kill himself" if he had to hand our child back to me every weekend. So he's left before he gets too attached and "doesn't want to pay child support"

He once tried to cheat on me, though he denies it and called me unreasonable for calling him out. The gaslighting is incredible.

I wonder how many children he has abandoned this way. His new girlfriend must be so proud.

What a prick, all excuses obviously. I wouldn't allow 50/50 either. I'd just get rid and claim CMA.

My father abandoned me in the same way, I'm 59 and have never been interested in finding him. Who wants to find a deadbeat dad.

Do not put this man on the birth certificate.
And I hope you don't give your baby his surname either.

No great loss for the child not to have him in their life by the sounds.

Block him on everything and to be honest when it gets near the time of the birth I would take yourself off all social media channels. He sounds like exactly the type who is all rights and no responsibilities - I think he's highly capable of popping up when you're at your most vulnerable to get himself on the birth certificate.

This would be a bad idea, clearly - you don't want him having parental rights.

Maybe he doesn't believe that it was an accident and has convinced himself you used him for a baby and trying to trap him, hence now turning into a not so nice person.

To be fair, when you fall pregnant unplanned, in a relationship not yet fully committed, and the woman is adamant she wants to keep the baby when the guy insists he doesn't want the baby, it rarely leads to a friendly outcome.

It’s a mind boggling timeline. You met him, got pregnant, he told you how badly he treated his ex and his child, he met someone else and moved an hour away and you’re still less than 12 weeks pregnant.

Did you just really want another baby?

It’s amazing how many women on here get pregnant whilst on birth control 🙄

He sounds like an awful father, do you really want him to be the father of your child? You'll be dealing with his shit for years.

Also how could your relationship be 'very good' while you were simultaneously 'ignoring red flags'?.

You got pregnant on birth control, you've decided to keep the baby, he doesn't want it. It was an accident so he shouldn't have to have anything to do with it if he doesn't want and he definitely can't force 50/50. If you're adamant on having this baby by yourself then I'd just claim child maintenance from him once baby is here and that's all.