Hi, I posted this in AIBU, buy poster suggested it would be better here, so hope that's okay!
Ds is 6. In the last two years Ex threatened to move to Australia (we're UK), and is currently with the his third girlfriend in this time. Each gf has had children, and my ds has been introduced to all of them. He still remembers their children as he still talks about them.
Ex has moved in with this latest woman. She has two older sons 8&12. My ds was sleeping in her 8yo bed when he was at his Dads and with the 8yo in the same bed at least once. Her two sons play Fortnite and my ex was allowing ds to play too, although apparently that's stopped. I've asked as the relationship is so new that our son stays at his house with him. He only sees him at Weekends and wouldn't want to be flung into another family setup to share his time with his dad with strangers. I obviously can't stop him introducing ds these women, but I'd at least like ds to sleep in his own room In his own bed surrounded by his own things.
Ds has behavioural problems which have resulted In behaviour chart and education meetings at school, and I have a CAHMS appointment next week for him. He needs stability and consistency, the same as any child, but this lessens his bad behaviours. I constantly advocate like any parent should for ds and I'm very involved and supportive of the school in order to help. His behaviour has meant that he mostly plays by himself at break (ht said about 80% of the time) and of course I want things to improve for him.
I phoned my ex today to apologise and to ask that we try and rebuild out relationship for the sake of ds (we haven't been together for nearly 5 years, but the last two years things have really broken down). He didn't answer. I called throughout the day, no answer. I start to worry. He eventually answers tonight. As soon as he picks up I can hear screaming and a woman. I got very upset. Ex shouted at me to fuck off...then shouted that I'm a shit mum because I thought driving my car off the road with ds in it. I had severe PND/psychosis and that day I was admitted to hospital. This was 6 years ago. My ds could have heard Ex shouting that at me.
Theres nothing I can do is there? I can't make him be better Dad. Ds loves him of course. AIBU is being so upset by all this, and expecting Ex not to move in with the latest gf, into a flat where he doesn't have his own room?