Have been with my husband for 27 years - 23 married. Our relationship has been on the rocks for years and last June we decided to split - decorate the house and sell. He is a very controlling person and I have basically felt that I have been walking on eggshells for years as he is verbally abusive at times and can be very moody. Anyway, to cut a long story short he stopped talking to me end of June - only about our two kids aged 20 and 17. I couldn't take anymore so I started proceedings and sent a lawyer letter. That was in August 2020.
Since then he has point blank refused to speak to me - when I enter a room he leaves. We buy separate food. We only communicate if it is to do with the kids- as he keeps reminding me we are separated now. I have asked that we be civil at least for the kids sake but he has refused.
I cannot afford to move out and rent and he is refusing to move out even though his mother has a spare room.
I have decided I want to remain in my home so looking to buy him out by cashing in an old works pension as I am 55. He is only 50 so needs the equity to buy a new house.
Proceedings are slow - I don't have family but I do have good friends - he has a family to support him who have stopped speaking to me. Does he really think going forward that we can never speak again given that there might be graduations/weddings etc. It is beyond immature and very cruel. When I try to talk to him he tells me he cant speak to me as I am "nuts." I have blown up at him a couple of times out of pure frustration. My friends say it is emotional abuse.
I was doing ok but have now "hit a wall" were I am struggling mentally with his behaviour. I am on Diazepam. He is acting like the last 27 years meant nothing and is already living like a single guy. He ha always been a cold character.
Any advice on how to cope before I clunk him over the head!