Why do I feel so upset about my sister divorce?

[panickingpat]

They have been together 24 years and have a 3 year old son. She said she's fallen out of love with him. He is heartbroken which is understandable but why do I feel so upset and sad.

Change is difficult.

Quite a few people told me how upset they were when I left my ex. Very few people knew what was going on in the marriage and my ex was apparently blindsided and heartbroken and didn’t have a clue why I moved out. He did, obviously, but he put on quite a display and there are loads of people I never saw again who probably still believe his version.

It’s okay to feel sad. It’s not okay to put that on your sister who will have her reasons. The bloody last thing i needed when I was in the middle of the shit storm living on a sofa was the friend who kept crying about how our social circle would change, the other friend who thought I was gutless for bailing and I should have “just tried a bit harder” and my stepmum who decided that she was still quite fond of him even after I broke down and told her and dad how terrible it had been so met up with him for a drink a few times.

I’m sure you’ll only be supportive of your sister and you’re definitely entitled to feel sad, just sharing my experience.

@AnneLovesGilbert Thank you for sharing that. Yes I will support my sister with whatever she decides. I was just shocked at how much it made me feel sad.

It is sad - and it changes your family. Perfectly natural.

It's change and its hard. I felt it when friends got divorced and now I'm the divorced one. Good place to vent (here).

Thank you all. Much appreciated