I have various reasons for leaving and various reasons for staying.
Reasons for leaving -
I don’t love him anymore, I don’t feel attracted to him
He drinks a lot and I hate it
He has cheated on me with sex workers in the past
I don’t trust him
He could help more as a father
I don’t feel special to him
Reasons for staying -
I am close with his family, his parents live next door
FIL currently has terminal cancer
Our kids are 3 & 6, I don’t know how this will affect them
Money - if I leave him I will have very little money and although this isn’t stopping me from leaving (if I could pick money or happiness then it’s happiness all the way), I will miss how comfortable I am
Lastly and probably most importantly, although he has hurt me in the past I don’t want to hurt him by leaving
These are the main points.
The main thing stopping me is our children and not knowing how they are going to take it. Anyone who has separated with children around these ages, how did they react? Did they struggle?
I don’t have anyone to turn to in real life so I feel like I have to come here. Any help would be great.