Hi, I realise there's far more important things to worry about during separation/divorce but am very recently separated and have various family birthdays coming up, the first one being my own.
Children are early teens and one of them in particular is very family oriented and so excited about any of our immediate family birthdays. She will want to carefully choose me a decent present and want to make it a special day for me.
I know it's not important in the big scheme of things and I would rather say to her don't worry about a present but that would upset her hugely.
Husband will definitely help her to buy me something but it feels kind of wrong to me that he has to be involved. We're not really communicating at the moment as I am feeling so hurt by him (I didn't want the separation) and it's supposed to be a trial separation anyway so we'll have to start communicating anyway at some point, for the kids. Divorce is not being spoken about at this stage.
How do people manage birthdays for each other during trial or full separation? How do we manage the kids' birthdays too?
I see other divorced parents in competition with who can take the kids on the best holidays and who can buy the best presents. That won't happen to us as funds won't allow but if teenager wants one generous type present for their birthday as mine do these days, how do we manage it? Does the gift come from both separated parents?
So much to think about anyway with all the upheaval and upset but this is particularly bothering me as my own birthday looms and DD will be starting to worry about it....
Any advice much appreciated, thanks😊