Maintenance during separation

[sophmum31]

Hi. Looking for some advice!

My STBX moved out last June. It has been a horrible abusive situation and he's basically mental.

Anyway, I am currently living in the family home which is in his sole name, I am not on the mortgage. He pays the mortgage of £350 a month. I pay everything else. He isn't currently paying any maintenance towards our two children - one he has eow and the other one refuses to see him. Looking at the child maintenance calculator he should be paying £500 a month.

He refuses as he has to pay rent on the place he is living at the moment. My solicitor has advised going through the CMA. He says if I do and he is forced to pay he will move back in and force me out of the master bedroom. Him moving back it would literally be torture! Our DD14 hates his entire being and it would be horrific for her and in turn horrific for everyone.

Do I call his bluff and put in the claim and risk him moving back in? I can't change the locks or similar as legally he owns the house.

I'd ask about getting a occupation order for the house and potentially a non mol (can be tricky if there wasn't violence).

Then after that, put in a CMS claim.

Could you compromise and suggest the £150 support and he continues to pay the mortgage?

If he genuinely can't afford rent plus mortgage plus maintenance then the house will need to be sold I guess? Would you get enough to move on if you sold? Would probably be better than having him pulling the strings forever. Then you could claim maintenance without worrying

Are you married ?
What’s his financial situation? Can he afford mortgage, rent, living plus cms ?
He is entitled to live there too and many couples have to live together while separating and splitting assets
What the plan for house and living longer term ?

My xh moved back in and brought the OW round whenever he liked. It was utterly fucking dreadful. I am by no means suggesting you roll over, but he really could just come back and save himself the rent until the house sells. He doesn't have to pay the mortgage, so would he pay the difference between mortgage and maintenance?

Are you married? Are you expecting to stay in the family home, if it’s in his sole name?

For £150 a month I would not open this can of worms yet, until housing situation was sorted. I’d think £1,800 over 12 months was a small price to pay for my DD’s mental health, I guess.

Of course he should pay CM. But your housing sounds perilous, so you need to look at the whole picture. I’m assuming you can’t afford to move out with the DC.

We are married and currently negotiating on the financial settlement. As soon as I can get some money I will be out of here! I will get enough to at least put a deposit on a house. His solicitor sent me justification for him not being able to pay any maintenance because he only has £1300 left a month after he has paid his rent, bills and the mortgage here so he can absolutely afford to pay it. He also has £190k in savings. I asked him to pay half (£200) towards a laptop for our daughter to use for home schooling and he said he had finished "bankrolling me", I've had to borrow the money until I get my settlement. He believes as he gave us money while we were married he's already paid

I will have to give it more thought, you are right that £150 a month is probably not worth risking him moving back in and our DD must come first. What a poor excuse of a man.

If you are married then the house is half yours and so are half of the 190k savings. You'll get a bigger percentage than half....make sure you see a solicitor

^^ Yes and do it quickly before it all mysteriously disappears!