When did you know?

[pixietinsle5]

When did you know your marriage/relationship was over? How long did you know before you ended things? What caused it to be over?

Sorry, lots of questions! 🤔

I think I knew my marriage was in serious trouble about 4 or 5 years before I finally bit the bullet. But even before then, there were signs, going back probably another 3 or 4 years. Lack of communication between us, resentments that built up and up over the years, zero sex for (up til.I pulled the plug) 10 years, feeling unwanted, unloved, undesired, lonely, always fantasizing about being apart and not being with him anymore. Differences on various things that became more noticeable over the years and just generally irritated by him. My main reason for not getting divorce in motion sooner was worrying about how it would affect the children but then I just got to the point where I really couldn6stsnd it any more. I'm a very physical person and crave physical closeness. Since I said I wanted a divorce , he suddenly became more interested and attentive but it was far too late as I'd lost all attraction for him and every time I looked at the future, he wasn't in it (as far as being toge6is concerned). My friend thinks he6wuite controlling but if he is, it's subtle and I find it hard to view him like that as he is a lovely person and a lovely Dad but I felt stifled for years. So, basically, if there's a niggle of doubt, it'll just grow and grow until it gets so huge you can't gnore it any longer and you have to make a decision - one that works for you (& not for everyone else - do it for you) xx What's your situation?

With hindsight, I knew about 10 years before we split. With hindsight, should have done something about it but I didn't. I just didn't trust him, for various reasons and I never could regain that sense of trust. He's increasingly become some I don't actually like any more. He's become more and more prejudiced and we share completely different values.