He would stand a good chance of custody wouldn't he?

[Mylittlesandwich]

It looks like me and DH might end up separating. If we do go down this route I'll obviously have to get a lawyer (somehow). My main concern is that if DH decides he wants custody of DS I think he stands a good chance. I'm currently working 2 jobs because DH was made redundant. I'm rarely at home but do care for DS whenever I can. I was main carer until mat leave ended and then we shared responsibility while DH was working. Since September however DH has been main carer. I'm so upset at the thought of EOW like a lot of NRPs get but it may well be in DSs best interests. I'm hoping I can convince DH that we should work on things but I can't force him to get help.

You need to see a Solicitor.

Would you need 2 jobs if you were supporting just yourself and the children and not a second adult? Why do you have to support him if you're getting divorced? Is OH looking for work? Can OH work? Could OH get himself a temp job? Do you have to be the only worker? Judges are unimpressed if someone is able to work but they choose not to. I understand from my Solicitor that the expectation is that each party tries to earn at least £15,000 in the run-up to a divorce (admittedly it's harder with current economic climate). You really need proper advice.

You should share weekends and week days anyway surely?

See a solicitor swiftly, so you know what to expect if it does come to a split. No need to mention this to DP as yet.

Your DP will presumably be getting back to work soon, and you would go down to one job? If that’s the case I don’t think a custody arrangement would be worked out according to your current short term circs. But see a solicitor so you can make sure you’re in the right place to share custody should the time come.

Thank you for the replies, sorry I didn't notice them. Things have been a bit hectic round here. As usual. I've spoke to DH, there's a lot of love there and I don't want to make any rash, situation induced decisions. He seems to be making an effort which I appreciate. I will still probably find out where I stand though although I have no idea where I'm going to find the time.

No to support just me and DS I wouldn't be working as much, I have family who would help me out with looking after DS while I worked too. I was supposed to take on more caring responsibilities as I'd reduced my working hours to 30 but when DH lost his job everything changed.