Hi all, I am not the person who wants to divorce, but I am asking for a friend who is in this situation. She has booked a consultation with a lawyer for mid-January, but I thought it might be good to tap into the Mumsnet's wisdom for advice in the meantime. She is of course aware I am posting this!
She was married for 15 years to her STBXH, 2 DC (13 and 10). Together for 20+ years. She is a very high earner and he was a low/ average earner. He used to earn around 1/3 of her salary. They split amicably almost 2 years ago and have been peacefully coparenting 50/50. They both rent as they are expats in a foreign country.
The plan was to divorce in 2020 or 2021, although she was in no rush as the situation was so amicable. They agreed they would split their assets 50/50 and go their separate ways financially. Soon after separating they sold the properties they had and already split the money then. They never legally separated, as the plan was to go straight to divorce.
Early in 2020 her STBXH lost his job due to Covid and has been unemployed since then. The job market looks pretty dire both here and back in the UK, but he is very lucky to be getting good unemployment benefits here until early 2022. So he can support himself and the DC for the moment.
She has been postponing the divorce for almost a year now whilst waiting for him to get a new job, but things are not looking great in terms of his prospects. She is concerned that they are still legally married, so she would be liable for any debt he might get. At the same time, divorcing whilst he is unemployed could expose her to the risk of him asking for alimony/ maintenance, although of course he swears he'd never do that..
Has anyone ever gone through a divorce with an unemployed ex spouse? What would your advice for her be? To wait until he has found another job, or do it now to minimize the risk of being responsible for his financial situation?
I repeat that she will speak to a lawyer in a couple of weeks of course. However, I know this forum is a goldmine of experience so I thought I would ask on her behalf.
Thanks!