Rock bottom where to start

[secrettwitcher]

I need some advice from you knowledgeable ladies please. I have finally plucked up the courage to tell my H it's over and have now got to work out what I do next. We rent, two kids, he pays the rent I pay the bills. I earn very little working from home 7 hours a week. I'm going to need to apply for benefits which saddens me.. he's being amicable but I suspect will change his tune soon enough. He cheated / practically lived a double life whilst working abroad earning shed loads of money (non of which I see) and i rumbled him after some very swift detective work! He then was 'asked to leave' the contract and came back to the UK came home tried to work it out.. found out more lies which ultimately crushed me. Couldn't forgive/forget and 3 years on here we are. I need a hand hold, need to make a tick list, I'm sad and so scared but I know to ever be happy again I have to do this. I trust no one, I'm ashamed of what he's done to me and my children and right now can just put one foot in front of the other 😔

@secrettwitcher, here to hold your hand. It sounds very tough and complicated but you are right, if you want to be happy ever again (or just stable and content- that is my goal at the moment) you need to go through this. Of course it is scary- we all feel that but imagine staying in current relationship till the end of your days - that is a pretty scary prospect as well.
I started with looking for a divorce lawyer, looking at local ones and reading reviews. Then making an appointment with the one i picked. I had first consultation back in April and for it i needed to get the facts ready so that focused me. Perhaps that would be a starting point for you too. I wrote down all the questions i wanted to ask so i don’t forget anything. You might need a more specialist advice (my case is pretty simple, amicable divorce and whilst i was part of his business in the past i am no longer involved in any way which is a blessing).