Oh the guilt!

[Febo24]

Hello!

Short version - we were coasting a bit, two DC 6 and 8. I found him web camming, turns out he was doing it every night and has a porn addiction.

After 3 months of trying, we split.

2 months on things are getting real, ive told him there is no way back for us. He's looking at flats to rent while I stay here.

But the guilt. THE GUILT.

He's schlepping about like a lost puppy. We went through bills etc and agreed how much he'll pay toward this house while renting which depressed him further (reality bites).

I think that even though he effed it up, because I'm the one forging ahead with the separation, it feels like I'm the one doing the splitting up. I have to keep raking over why this is happening, which isn't good.

Anyone find themselves in this dynamic? Does it go away? I'm so tired of it all.

Same dynamic, still going on 18 months later. Ex fucked up, a marriage counselor told me to leave because his behaviour was abusive, and yet he's playing the wronged party.

Oddly, the more he is doing it, the less guilty I feel. It confirmed to me that moving on was the best thing for us. He can't accept his mistakes, apologize or move on. But I can, and have.

Onwards towards a better life for you and DC.