How to deal with STBXH using joint account for personal use?

[silverribbonxmastree]

I have NC for this. Apologies if it is a bit garbled.

I have left my mentally unstable husband. He refused to leave the house. Kids with me. Staying with family. Divorce proceedings recently served.

We each have our own bank accounts and each put the same amount into the joint account to cover the mortgage, bills, food and other household expenses.

Prior to me leaving, he told me that I wasn't allowed to use the joint account without his say so🙄

Anyway, since I left. I have been paying for my own stuff (and kids) from my own account and was hoping that he would do the same too and that the joint account would just cover bills. I was going to suggest a lesser amount being paid in. I also hope that my continuing to pay the mortgage despite not living there could be factored into any settlement.

DH has banned me from entering the house (joint names) and assaulted me last week when I tried to get some of my stuff - police were called. He is very unstable (addict).

Anyway, the mortgage still needs to be paid so I can't not pay it. I have removed the overdraft facility. However, DH has over the last 2 weeks paid for items amounting to £150 so far - I'm guessing food.

I don't think it would be a good idea to remove my name from the joint account? Any ideas?

Speak to the bank and have the DD for the mortgage from your account

Get your name off the household bills

Have you spoken to a solicitor?

My solicitor said to freeze any joint accounts, move all bills into his name but keep paying mortgage as it’s joint names.

Make sure he understands that he will be responsible if he misses the payment

Yes, I will arrange for the bills to be taken out of my name into his name.

I was hoping that we could continue to pay the mortgage at least from the joint account. As it would wipe out my wage packet if I had to pay for it alone. I do have savings so I guess I could pay it whilst he continues to live in the house for free!!!

All my solicitor has said so far is to remove the OD.

Can you arrange to only put in half the mortgage amount into the joint account just before the date it is due?

I guess I should tell him what I am doing if I put bills in his name, take my name off the joint account but continue to pay my share of mortgage into the joint account. I have already spoken to mortgage company so they are aware of marital dispute and can let me know if any payment fails.