Starting again with mortgage and property purchase

[PondDipper]

Thanks for reading this thread.

I’m busy getting my ‘ducks in a row’ at the moment as things are awful at home. Problems for 2 years+ (truthfully more like 4 ) and I’m planning on separation soon. He knows things are heading that way but probably not the timescale I have in mind.
I’ve decided that I’ll be the one to leave. Renting somewhere seems like a waste of money and I’m currently mortgage free.
My plan is to buy a 3 bed, new build house for DC and me. My income is reasonable, a part time public sector job and I run a business and have books signed off by accountant for 3 years. I’m 44.
My idea is that I can be self sufficient and leave him to stay in the house and manage the bills until he buys me out.
I suppose my question is... has anyone done this? Where do I start with a mortgage? Could I buy a house, whilst still living with him? Should I get legal advice? Everything is likely to be extremely amicable. There’s no animosity, just incredible sadness. However, I need to be pragmatic and make plans with my life I can’t stay here. This is my loose plan.

I would imagine many people have done this although I haven't done it myself. You start with the mortgage by going to see a broker and getting a decision in principle. You can buy a house while your still living with him of course, many families have more than one house. Definately get legal advise. Don't count on him being extremely amicable when you've served the divorce papers on him.

Definitely get advice. If you buy while you are still married then your spouse is entitled to half the equity in both houses, not just the former marital home. It won't make much difference if you'd be changing your savings I to house equity. But you should definitely ask about this when you see a solicitor.

I’m guessing that both of your names are on the mortgage for your current shared home? If so, that will have implications for you buying your own home as it will be regarded as a second home.

If things are amicable, you can make an arrangement between yourselves. My (ex) eh and separated in January but have continued living together while I buy my own place (he’s buying me out, I cannot afford to stay in our home). I had an offer accepted on a house and we then decided between ourselves how the equity would be split.

Thanks for the replies. I think legal advice would be a good idea.
There’s no mortgage on our current home and I suppose if I buy another house it would be a marital asset (but also a debt!).
Things seem easy in my mind but i suppose legal advice would help identify potential issues.

I appreciate your help

Definitely get legal advice. Also don’t underestimate how challenging it can be even with 3 years of books and a part time job. Would it not be easier for you to both move out and split the cash so you would need less of a mortgage? Or do you think the house would be the sticking point in that he would want to stay there?

I’ve had some legal advice today. He could have a claim on my house in any divorce settlement, but as it would likely just be the deposit that would be equity (which I’d pay from my own savings), it’s only the same as taking account of money in the bank.

I’d prefer to move out as I couldn’t manage this size of house and garden on my own and run a business as a single parent. The DC’s would have less disruption if they could stay where they are and we have 50:50 custody.

Getting a mortgage is proving difficult and I’m currently looking at the help to buy scheme which is complicated by the fact my name is already on a property.

I think once I’ve made the decision to leave I’d want to go. Staying here for another year whilst I buy would be awful.

Thanks everyone.

May be worth weighing up if renting would be better in the short term until you can sell the main house (as an alternative to help to buy) - renting somewhere smaller short term may be easier.

Best of luck with whichever route you go

I wouldn’t make any financial moves until you have a divorce agreement in place. You are assuming a lot of factors and without wanting to be negative, the man I divorced bears no resemblance to the one I separated and things got super nasty

I think you would have to pay extra stamp duty as you'd be buying g a second home and you couldn't get help to buy either. You need to sell first to buy or get him to buy you out.