Thinking of pulling out of house sale

[Porseb]

My home is sale agreed but I have not found anything to buy (prices seem to have really shot up due to stamp duty holiday), rentals would be 2 to 3 times my current mortgage.

I am selling as separated but ex is living in another house we jointly own.

Both properties are mortgaged.

I feel like I'm being forced to sell and trade down but he's not.

He's in a 3 bed detached, kids and I in 5 bedroom detached.

I can afford mortgage on my own on an interest-only basis.

I dither between selling is the right thing to do now and not wanting to sell.

What would you do? I think I need help to separate the emotion out of this whole process.

I don't understand. Are you go eating divorced? In which case how are assets being divided?

Presumably the kids move between the two houses? How many?
Interest only is all very well, but you have to pay the capital back sometime.
Broadly speaking selling sounds the right thing to do, but if you have nowhere to move to yet, then...

Are you sure you haven't just not found the right place to buy yet because you don't want to move so it makes a good excuse?

We will be getting divorced but haven't really started proceedings - just living in separated houses for over a year.

Kids do not stay over at his place. They may go for dinner once a month or so.

I have looked at so many houses but anything I've put a bid on, I've been outbid fed. Some houses going in 2 weeks.

I accept I will have to sell this house eventually but wondering if I should sell now (when market seems to be moving quickly) or just wait until kids finish university and are independent (5 years or so)

If I sell now, I have the disadvantage of not finding something to move into and higher rental costs.

Definitely a downgrade in living accommodation

Stay if you can afford to and ride it out.

You need to get some good legal and financial advice. Allowing this situation, not getting a settlement and divorce agreed, to drag on is not in your interests.

From your post it sounds like you children are at least 16/17. As they get older and are classified as adults, whether at university or not, the settlement you can expect becomes more equal. There certainly won’t be justification to have a 5 bed house unless there is a lot of capital and assets in your marriage.

I don’t know your personal circumstances but interest only mortgages even in a growth market are forms of renting. The current upsurge is driven by the stamp duty break and a period of limited market supply and activity caused by COVID.

The difficulty with your position is that as you get older your productive years, the time when you earn money for old age and retirement, dwindles.

Thanks - with the current interest free mortgage situation, I'm able to save and put aside a lot more money so yes, it's a form of renting but the rental is a lot lower than what's available on the market.

I get what you say about asset split. I know I will probably get less as the kids get older but I'm thinking a few more years on interest-free will allow me to build up my own savings.

ExH and I currently split mortgage payments 50-50 and he gives me CMS calculations for DC.

My biggest worry is how bad a downturn there will be post covid and Brexit and whether I would be able to sell in a few years time if I need to.

I think there will be a lot of people who want to move when this is finally over.

What's the difference in value between the 5 bed and the 3 bed?

If you're looking after the children 100% of the time surely you need more asset wise?

Have you seen a solicitor?

If you add up the value of both houses/pensions/other assets is the 5 bed house worth 50-80% of that - if so you may get that (at least)

CMS doesn't figure - comes out of income so ignore that for now

It benefits you in some way to sort out the finances now

Worst case scenario - could you have the 3 bed ? Is it big enough? Plus other cash etc

In your shoes I would 100% stay put. It puts you in a much stronger position. And it's much better financially for you and your kids

Thanks - I've had a chat with solicitor but not instructed one yet.

I had hoped we could agree a financial split ourselves before instructing solicitors.

I may need to revisit this before selling the house.

Have you seen a financial adviser who specialises on assisting through divorce?

Also tax advice. If as a couple you own 2 properties, even though separated, you may also need advice about Capital Gains Tax in relation to the sale of one, and on additional SDLT (stamp duty) on your onward purchase. Both of these issues may mean you are better off selling/transferring ownership between you as part of a divorce settlement - there some tax rules that then apply. I am not a tax expert - you need proper advice.

Dont move, and get to a solicitor.

And think carefully about your future income, pension and roof over your head when deciding.

I didn't even know there was such a thing as a financial adviser that specialises in divorce settlements!

I just have a mortgage broker who's trying to find out if I can get an interest-only mortgage on my own - I'll have to go and look up financial advisers for divorce.

Thanks

Porseb, if you can get an interest only mortgage, and can afford it, I think it would be best if you stay put.
You have enough things to sort out without the extra emotions of finding and moving house.
It might be that house prices will continue upward due to many people wanting to move after this pandemic settles down, but nobody knows for sure.

@Porseb

Thanks - I've had a chat with solicitor but not instructed one yet.

I had hoped we could agree a financial split ourselves before instructing solicitors.

I may need to revisit this before selling the house.

No. You don't do this. You see a solicitor who will get you the best deal for you. It already reads like your husband is getting the best deal here which can't be right.

I would think a nice 5 bed house would hold it's value more than a 3 bed.
When DC leave home could you rent out part of the property as a flat if you find you are in dire straits. If it has lost value so you don't want to sell?
Could you consider a lodger now.

You may be trading Down but you’re in. 5 bed which you don’t need and he’s in a 3....

As posters have said interest only means you’re renting it really

No one on here with the sparse info can advise because we don’t know what assets, earnings etc there are
Even then only your solicitor will be able to guide you
Contrary to pp often larger houses lose value first as the 3 beds keep higher demand but this is all guesswork
See a solicitor and work on asset split before you do anything.

Can't you move into the 3 bed house and your husband buys somewhere smaller with the proceeds of the 5 bed house? Don't keep your buyers hanging on though if you are changing your mind - set them free so they can find somewhere else quickly before the stamp duty holiday ends..