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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Child's deteriorating emotional health

6 replies

CatCowMeowMeow · 12/10/2020 11:01

New poster here. I am looking for advice on how to handle my child's emotional health. She isn't coping well with the separation and subsequent child arrangement court case. My ex was aggressive and emotionally abusive towards us both, sometimes violent. It has been almost 2 years since the separation and I thought things would get better in time. Social services have not been helpful. She cries a lot, daily, and has even said that she wants to die. She is acting out and being aggressive towards me and using aggressive language towards her friends, I think copying what she has seen modelled by her father. As a result she is losing friends and then of course feeling even worse. How do I best support her or get her some help to turn this around? Has anyone experienced this? Is this depression, should I call the GP? I feel at a total loss with how to help her.

OP posts:
passthemustard · 12/10/2020 11:10

Yes definitely see the GP and ask for a CAMHS referral. I'm sorry your social worker hasn't been better, I'm pretty sure they can refer to CAMHS or could have at least sign posted you there.

CatCowMeowMeow · 12/10/2020 11:42

Thanks for your reply passthemustard

We don't have a social worker as every assessment made has ended in a case closed, no further action needed. I am quite astonished at how little support has been offered to us. I've only been signposted to various charities that are so oversubscribed that they can't help.

OP posts:
WeDontDoPrincess · 12/10/2020 13:19

CAMHS have been worse than rubbish for us - very long waiting list (best part of a year) and even then very little they could offer.

How old is your daughter? Have you spoken to the school? We found the school were able to access more and in faster time. We've seen a community education nurse (I might be making that job title up?) who saw DD at school weekly for 1:1 sessions and spent time getting my perspective too.

Best of luck.

CatCowMeowMeow · 12/10/2020 13:59

WeDontDoPrincess
I am sorry to hear that CAMHS haven't been great for you, I hope your child is doing ok?

She is 9. School haven't been great, to be honest. I have tried to push them for support and mostly been fobbed off, I think they are just finding me annoying now. This despite the fact that one of our social services referrals re dads abuse actually came through the school, so in the theory they are well aware of the issues/background. I might try to speak to them again and mention the community education nurse.
Thanks for the advice.

OP posts:
blackcurrantjam · 16/10/2020 14:49

This book is supposed to be good:

www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B002SR2PVK/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1&tag=mumsnetforu03-21

Palaver1 · 17/10/2020 06:24

Can I also throw in hormones and her body preparing itself do not underestimate this massive impact on her emotional state and judgement

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