Does anyone have any positive stories about Court & Child Arrangements & Cafcass?

[Hettyispink]

Partner is taking his Ex to court over Child Arrangements following two years of games and manipulation over his contact time and an inability to plan ahead for anything ongoing. Child is nearly 14 and currently has to ‘negotiate’ and communicate between her parents.

We have been hearing some pretty depressing stories about how crap the court system is and how it takes years to sort even the simplest things out. One person even said that given her age they might deliberately keep adjourning so that eventually she’s too old for them to deal with the case.

I’m supporting him emotionally through this and I’d rather know the reality.

He was taking advice from his solicitor to go to mediation, negotiate a consent order etc and she just delayed and delayed. Offered crumbs. One step forwards, two steps back. Kept hoping she’d see sense... Then the money ran out so he started the court cases self-representing. It takes months and months for a hearing these days. Six months between hearings.

Ok I see, it's just so so sad some of these adults being like this with their children :(. And a controlling adult is really no picnic to deal with so . I hope like you say one day she will realise he really is trying for her and they can find their way back to each other. And getting her to be as assertive as possible with the mum might work and him making sure he is really discouraging the go between element. One day she might feel strong enough to rebel against the mum and say no sorry I'm seeing my dad. I'm no expert so what others have said and . It's just so awful.

It just doesn't make much sense. Are you saying that in that example, her mum threatened her with taking something away if she dared going to her dad? Why would she do that when it was at a regular contact time any way?

I don't doubt that she loves her dad but there might be reason why she is not so keen to come as often but she isn't telling because she doesn't want to upset him.

She I can believe wants to see her father
Will be in a very vulnerable place as her loyalties to a degree are with the main carer..
Some children will do what they have been told
Ie get on with your work don’t leave the house.
Op the mothers anger is due to the break up of the marriage.
Can’t be easy for either of you living in close proximity.