My stbxh left our home 3 months ago and we've been on a roller-coaster with our financial agreement and coming to terms with it all. I think we might finally be getting somewhere with that now.
When I have to speak to him there's such a pity party which I am training myself to detach from, trouble is I can see why he's so low. He has no family or friends (his choice, not my fault), he is in a lot of pain with a chronic medical complaint, he is very down, very bitter and very very lonely. He doesn't want to come back and I certainly don't want him to. I pushed for us to separate.
I know I am giving him way too much headspace, every bloody day I'm thinking about solicitor stuff, worrying about him and what he's going to do. I'm hoping this will lessen when the house and finances are sorted. I know that I will have little money left after it all but I also know that I've swapped money for peace and hopefully, eventually, happiness. I'm wondering if I would benefit from some counselling to help me heal from this controlling relationship and the guilt I am left with but don't know where to start. Are all therapists equal? Is there something I need to be looking for when choosing? Anyone been helped by some therapy in my position?