Don't know where to start with getting the process going

[WellThatIsThatThen]

I'm so overwhelmed and fed up but to the point of being numb and I literally cannot get myself into gear to sort out the practical side of starting the process of getting divorced.

I can't even physically bring myself to say out loud to my husband that I want one (not that it would come as a surprise I'm sure). I doubt he would move out whilst we put the house up for sale and I can't imagine what the atmosphere will be like if we had to remain living together whilst we sold the house.

I need to figure out the finances as I only work part time so need increase my income but I'm just sat here not doing anything about it. Have two young teens but one with ASD so going full time isn't that straight forward or is it? I really don't know. I'm currently furloughed so until September I don't know if increasing my hours is possible. I have an idea for a second income stream but can't seem to think straight long enough to sort it out.

I think he would be agreeable to a 50:50 financial split but that wouldn't be enough to buy a house where we currently live. I feel I would want a bigger piece of the equity given that he has a £50K salary and even full time I would get to about £30K but currently £18k plus I generally am responsible for the children. He's never been restricted in his earnings as when it comes to the kids it all falls to me. If we can't agree on the finances what is the process in terms of legal advice? I had a consultation with a solicitor two years ago and to be honest it cost me £200 and she basically gave vague advice that it would be a case of see what there is a split it based on need. I would need every penny for a house so the thought of throwing money at huge legal fees makes me nervous.

Sorry I'm not sure what I'm asking for here. Possibly just a well meaning kick up the arse to start sorting myself out.

Is it possible to get legal advice? It doesn't sound like it's as easy as a 50/50 split in your situation but I don't know how it all works

Does your child with additional needs have an EHCP or formal diagnosis from, say, CAMHS OP? This would all go towards evidence that you need to keep the house until the youngest is 18, or that you need a larger share of the equity. Does your H have pensions etc too?

But it does sound like @parched's recommendation to make that 15 minute call would likely be the kick up the arse!

@parched I'm following you round the threads this morning I think you should demand commission for your recommendations! Seriously though its great to hear someone has found something simple and helpful

@dishingoutdone I think I saw the recommendation on here. They've been really helpful and their approach was refreshing. I initially went to see a solicitor who was so adversarial and just didn't listen to what I wanted. Amicable have been human and empathetic.