I'm a sole carer if three children under 8. Their Father has no contact, mandated by the Court on an interim basis, because of his treatment of the children and me.
I'm stuck overseas because we moved here 2 years ago and as we move through the Court process I cant leave here even for a holiday with the kids due to anti-abduction laws. He wont give us permission. The Court hearings will go on for at least another year.
I'm terrified and feel very alone. We have supporting professionals around us but no one else can help me do what I need to do. Only I can raise my children and I have to do it alone.
I have huge fears for them, will I be enough...Will their Father claw back into their lives, is no contact even the right outcome for them....
I also have huge fears for myself. I'm lonely and everything reminds me just constantly through the day about how much I miss my ex husband, then I feel sick for feeling that because of what he has done. I don't think anyone will ever want to be with me and I will always be alone. I'm now damaged. I come with three children. I come with too much baggage now.
I am terrified of the pressure of battling my ex (who is very legally agressive), helping my children recover, working, running a stupidly big house that was meant to be our 'forever home', worrying about finances, wondering if I will ever get to leave here or if I will be trapped forever. I was at a senior level in my career, but now just don't care. I dont care about much at all.
Thats a lot to put out there, but maybe someone will understand.