Never apologises

[floatingmyboat]

Staying with DP is draining. After every argument no matter who was at fault I have to be the first to initiate talking again and any other move or it's cold, sit on the other side of the couch, no touching each other days. The vibe in the house through those days are toxic so it's better if I just back down for the sake of our DC4 and DC2 (and dogs).

I feel that he is a great partner but after each argument I think is he really? Because each time after arguing and I've basically not acted sorry he is like a child ignoring me until I speak/act first! Which man has never apologised to his woman? It makes me really angry! I feel like he isn't a man and it makes me resent him. He is a great father which is what I'm mostly holding on to. If he wasn't here I'd struggle for 1, and DC will definitely be asking for him. What can I do?!

Lack of ability to apologise indicates cowardice and inability to take responsibility for ones' own behaviour. It's horrible being the one who always has to make overtures.

My ex was like this. It was crushing and I started to resent him. And then despise him for being weak.

Subsequently I was with a very deeply unsuitable man for a while but one of the very endearing features about him was he was so in tune to when he had upset me and would always always apologise and talk about it. He had many other serious failings (!) but that was a revelation!

If you want to save things then would you consider counselling together? He may genuinely not realise how hurtful and selfish his behaviour is. It's up to you whether you stick by him while he learns.
I couldnt be bothered because I decided kindness and selflessness cant, by and large, be learned. But I am an intolerant short tempered old mare these days!