Mediation not working

[VConcerned67]

I am very worried because dh and I have separated but he won't agree to me having more than 50% of the house. I feel I should have it because our 2 children (one is 20 and works full-time and the other is 21 and at university) want to come and live with me so I need a bigger house.

Dh says I earn more per hour than him but the thing is, I don't work as many hours as him so I actually earn less.

What can I do now? Will he have to give me spousal maintenance?

No he won't have to give you spousal as you have similar earnings potential. You need to look to increase hours asap.
Unfortunately child maintenance and the need to house the child only applies to minors, under 18, so as neither of your offspring is a child, and at least one is earning, 50/50 would sound the fairest way.

Unfortunately adult children aren’t considered in housing needs
If earnings are similar it’s likely to be 50:50 split

Your children are adults, one working full time

He's got a point it should be 50/50 split.

But one is a full-time student? Surely she's not counted as an adult? She has another year at uni to go yet. They both want to live with me. If dh agrees that I can have more than the 50% to house the children, will the court just rubber-stamp it, or will they say he should have the 50%? I'm just trying to work out how to proceed really.

The full time student is counted as an adult.

I really cannot see you getting more than 50% and certainly not any spousal support.

What is the house actually worth? Maybe you could sell it and still have enough to buy a house for you and your adult children.

Or maybe you and your working adult child could get a joint mortgage if they are adamant they want to live with you.

What -‘% are you seeking?
Are there pensions involved too ?

I am trying to get him to agree to 60/40. He only really needs a flat, maybe 2 bed, but I have the two children and the dog you see.

Yes there are pensions. I have a tiny one which isn't worth much but I'm going to ask for 50% of his.

You could ask him to trade equity to keep all his pension

You don't have the two children
You have 2 adults who want to live with you.

Is yours being split 50% too?
I’m sorry but your needs are not greater than his. You’re splitting pensions, you have adult children and equal earnings ( if you work same hours)
In my view ( not a lawyer) should be 50:50
My own solicitor has advised mine will be 50:50 as I earn just a little shy of my ex and our children are still early teens ....

Realistically the full time earner won’t want to live with a parent much longer and could contribute rent. 50/50 sounds about right in these circumstances

If you get a new mortgage both adult children will have to fill in forms for the lender. If one is working then getting them on the mortgage may be easier.

The idea you'd get more than 50% is not very realistic.

By comparison I have 3 primary aged children, one is disabled, I'm disabled and the main carer, I work part-time because of caring and being disabled, I earn less (about a third) and can't increase my hours, and I've been advised that 60/40 in my favour would be an exceptional outcome (50/50 is more likely).

You need to get proper advice, and realize that you are going to have to support yourself entirely from now on.