I have been condsidering divorcing my H for a couple of years now. He cheated with prostitutes 3 years ago but due to PND at the time and me wanting a stable family unit for our child I decided I would give him a second chance to prove himself. There have been no further indiscretions and he has treated me exceptionally well.
The problem now is with me in that I can't seem to let it go and I still don't trust him, even though he has gone out of his way to prove he isn't that man anymore.
I almost feel like I'm the one now who is providing an insecure family unit for my child by my inability to move past this and creating a hostile environment.
Another issue is that our child has some SEN. I find him sometimes tricky to deal with as time with him can be intense. Although I love him so much, and the thought of only seeing him half the week tears me apart, I worry that without my H here, our child would be miserable as his Dad is exceptionally good with him and brings him so much joy and brings a real positive energy into the house, where I am more prone to anxiety and depression.
I worry that my child would be hugely affected if we did separate, and he already has so many mountains to climb on a daily basis and potentially struggle to ever come to terms with it and also miserable on his days with me.
I dont know what I'm asking really but I feel sort of stuck.