Being paid for sex by ex??

[Chuffaluffa]

So my husband (separated) turns up today and again expects to watch me get dressed/in the shower etc, despite knowing I’m dating someone, and my mum even telling him I need privacy just a few weeks ago. Then tells me he was serious in our pub jokes the other day, and asks if he could pay me for no-strings sex. He knows I’m skint, and has openly told me he’ll pay as little as he can for the children once we move out of the marital home, as that’s the only way he can afford to keep it (not entirely true, if at all).

Question is, I’ve just told my new partner and he was absolutely disgusted, and said it speaks massively of my husband feeling that he owns me and that I’m still his, and that I should maybe be more concerned than I am. He thinks most women would be warning me about this type of behaviour- is he right? I’m so numb to it, Christmas has been awful, I’m just putting a brave face on for the kids, I’m trying not to let anything in. How would you feel?

Also, merry Christmas, ho ho effing ho (unfortunate turn of phrase!)

@Chuffaluffa my exh wanted/expected sex with me for quite a while when we split up, he would say it would help him clear his head! After a few times I stupidly said I would and made it clear I didn’t want to (I haven’t had sex with him for ages because id wanted to, so thought I’d cope with it!) I did it felt dirty awful and I felt used. Of course it didn’t stop him asking and he kept saying he was entitled, I talked it through with my sister and friend and started to keep the evidence in case I needed it. He once asked me whilst my son was at his new accommodation and expected that I would do it whilst he was downstairs! It never helps the situation and once I realised that he repulsed me further and I promised myself I would never sleep with someone just to keep/make them happy again. It is not normal behaviour so keep yourself safe

Does you soon to be ex husband not have a girlfriend?

He's asked, you've said, "No", so that should be the end of it.

I have, however, known couples who have separated and sometimes have another partner, who still sleep together occasionally. It really isn't that uncommon. However, him offering to pay you for it is a different matter altogether.

(How much did he offer?)

I have no idea how I’ve got myself in this mess.

You haven't got yourself into this mess, Chuffaluffa, it's just a very difficult situation at the moment.

I sincerely hope you can keep your home, I don't see why not.

Do you have a lock on the bathroom door?
Initially similar was happening with me but now I get sufficient privacy and we both respect our needs for privacy.
Hope he turns a corner.