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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Stbexh is ignoring his own solicitor

4 replies

Blushingm · 06/12/2019 11:22

We split in July 2016 - I filed for divorce, my solicitor pushed for the nisi and now it's just finances. I've said I'll take joint debts if I take the house (it equals itself out). My solicitor thinks I'm being more than reasonable, he and his solicitor agreed but when it comes to signing he's ignoring his own solicitor.

My solicitor keeps chasing but his replies saying they've not had any further instructions.

I just want to be divorced and it all be finalised and I can't understand why he is dragging his feet so much.

My solicitor has given his 7 days before she contacts ex directly and if nothing then it will have to go in front of the judge instead.

Why is he being like this? Bare in mind he won't speak to me even over text!

OP posts:
NotSuchASmugMarriedNow1 · 06/12/2019 16:43

I expect he's had second thoughts about signing the house over.

Whats happening about pensions?

willowmelangell · 06/12/2019 16:53

Just a thought, but is there a 3rd person maybe suggesting to your ex he should have some cash? Perhaps his family or a gf?

Graphista · 06/12/2019 17:53

My ex dragged his heels - in his case he was lying to ow/now 2nd wife that it was me dragging things out, he was avoiding divorce being finalised in order to avoid remarrying!

She was pregnant and pushing to marry before baby was born which didn't end up happening.

Once I found out due to a comment she made at a handover of dd, next time I saw her I handed her evidence that it was him! Based on what I saw once they were back in their car it didn't go down well Grin

But yes if he's with someone new it's possible it's a way of delaying getting more serious with her, or someone's in his ear about finances...

There'll be a reason you need to figure out what, possibly with help from your solicitor.

At some point from what I recall there are things your and his solicitor can do to force things to go faster.

My ex tore through solicitors anyway as he wouldn't listen to anyone! He wasn't happy about financial decisions, pissed me and dd about over contact, harassed me by phone and in person, harassed his ex solicitors...

At one point he was even almost removed from a court hearing about contact because he wouldn't quit arguing with his own solicitor during it!!

It was an education because until then I hadn't known it could be quite difficult for a solicitor to divest themselves of a client.

My own 2nd solicitor (1st was useless) was somehow able to get info on what happened, by the time I was with her he was on his 4th and by the time the divorce was complete his 5th.

It all got sorted eventually but would have been much easier/quicker if he'd just listened to someone.

Hope you get things sorted soon

Blushingm · 06/12/2019 19:28

Thanks for your replies - he's not with anyone else but I've a feeling his parents may be in his ESR, telling him every time my solicitor writes it costs me money, they'll be loving that!

Pensions are staying out of things, I only worked 17hrs a week until last year (I was studying to be a nurse when we split up) so his are worth a lot more than mine - I went part time when DS was born 18 years ago

You'd have thought if he wasn't happy settlement wise he'd tell his solicitor? But then ex isn't the sharpest tool in the box

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