My DH has been battling with some sort of depression / anxiety since the birth of our DD 8 years ago. The birth seemed to coincide with him dropping everything in his life. He left the rugby club and all the social events that went alongside it , stopped seeing friends and family and relied upon me for everything. I told him it was suffocating and have tried everything including getting him season tickets for his team to encourage him to have some social hobbies ( and he just doesn't go) . As everything in life is left for me to organise , BTW we both work FT , I have asked time and time again for him to plan the odd outing for us but we've had at most 1 per year and every excuse gets thrown at me why he hasn't . We have plenty of family for babysitting , if he would only ask . Anyway after a trial separation he promised to get help and he's on medication but we still get regular episodes which he is blaming me for . Apparently if I would talk to him more regularly ( what ever that means ) then he'd completely change, not need medication and he'd get his old friends back and start planning things for us as a family . I'm so exhausted as it's always someone else's fault and we went through years of counselling but it didn't really help as DH thought the councillor was picking on him / siding with me. I don't know what to do , when he's not in an episode he's a good father and does his share around the house ( but nothing more than that) . From a cultural perspective it is a difficult thing , but not impossible , to leave and I know he won't make it easy . He's started to tell lots of lies and then deny saying anything when I call him out . At the moment I'm only with him because of our DD and he knows that but is doing nothing to try and show me that we do have a chance, if anything he is pushing me further away . It's so toxic I know I need to leave but I suppose I'm asking if anyone else was in a similar situation and can it get better?