Judge’s Refusal Certificate of Decree Nidi

[HulaChick]

Hi, just joined up here, so apologies if I don’t know how this site works!
Anyway, am getting divorced from my husband (I’m the Petitioner) and am currently at the stage where I have submitted my application for Decree Nisi (at Bury St Edmunds Divorce Centre) Although my husband has not contested it, he sent in a supporting statement basically saying that although he accepts my Petition and reasons for Unreasonable Behaviour, he doesn’t think they’re a fair reflection of our marriage overall. Anyway, I’m really concerned that the judge may refuse my application and ask for more details. What I want to know, is what kind of extra details do they ask for and how common is it for that to happen? I’m trying to keep it as amicable as possible and I softened my reasons in the petition as he really doesn’t want to get divorced, whereas I just want it over and done with. I don’t want it to become acrimonious if I have to make him out to sound worse just to get it through!! What really is the likelihood o a judge refusing if he can see my husband has agreed to divorce, hasn’t contested it, yet sent in a statement which, although says my comments in Petition were unfair, also says he sees this as the way forward? I’m really panicking now!!
Many thanks in advance 😊

Mine went through. The other went round. He made up a load of lies which I didn't contest as I wanted the divorce but I wrotend in to say I did not agree with the petition
It still went through.

My ex refused to sign the Absolute - the judge took it as proof positive he was unreasonable and granted the divorce. I never had to step in to a court - that was my solicitors job.
Please stop worrying about this - he's not contesting it, that's all the court will be looking at. His enclosed moaning letter means nothing.

My ex has done this I'm confident in my reasons and his whine makes it stronger....apparently I should let go the fact that he was arrested for sexual assault on a minor child and stop throwing it in his face because the police didnt prosecute him 😑 pretty sure the judge will put mine through

Thanks for replying - that sounds promising then, although sorry to hear you had lies written about you.

God, I bloody hope so!! He’s obsessed with putting his view over and doesn’t understand or accept how unhappy, undesired and unloved he’s made me feel over the years and how, as a result, I came to resent him and not want to spend any time with him. He maintains he’s always done things for the family’s benefit (which he has) but doesn’t really get that it was at the expense of our relationship. He’s not a bad man, in fact he’s very kind and it’s difficult to put a finger on one thing that deeply but, also, he’s quite passive aggressive and quite controlling, although he would swear blind that he’s not and that he’s always been generous which, again he has, but at the same time, I’ve felt I’ve had to hide a lot from him incase he disapproved!! Not the sign of a good and healthy marriage hey??

My solicitor basically told me that the fact that you’ve applied for divorce is reason enough to grant it because one of you doesn’t want to be married I believe it only becomes a problem if he contests it which solicitors don’t really advise because it’s a matter of proving that your feelings about unreasonable behaviour are unjust and one persons perception on something can be so different to another’s.

Judges must see this everyday. The point is that you are divorcing them for unreasonable behaviour to the extent that the marriage has broken down. It is hardly surprising that the respondent doesn't agree. They are being unreasonable. Which adds to the case.

It is a very odd feeling singing a form which you are saying is the truth when your husband/wife is saying it isn't the truth but they won't defend the divorce. I found it really upsetting.

I hope it all goes through without any hitches.

I do t even think they read them properly really any more if they aren't contested. It will be fine. Huge backlog at Bury st Ed's centre though so expect it to take a while.