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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Happy after-divorce stories!

29 replies

Sesicilana · 06/11/2019 11:06

I think s lot of us needs some happy ending stories after divorce/separation. I decided few days ago I’m going ahead divorcing my husband. I’m so numb and can’t even see the light at the end of the tunnel. Can some of you share some happy ending stories?

OP posts:
xoxo80 · 14/05/2020 12:33

@Relocationrelocationetc we found once we made the decision we started getting on so much better so it does make you doubt but it gets better with time and your confidence with that will grow! I was like you about people and not feeling arsed but it's amazing how your mood changes with time ! Fingers crossed it all works out for you . Good luck and if you want to ask me anything please feel free 😊

WhatInFreshHell · 14/05/2020 13:02

I'm two years on from leaving our matrimonial home (My H had an affair...and blamed me!) and we share a 5 year old DS. I'm the happiest I've ever been, especially the last 6 months or so. I've grown so much as a person, I don't take shit from anyone and I'm a damn good mother!

I love the life that my DS and I have now. I have plenty of money from our house sale equity and I'm fortunate to be in the position where I don't need to worry about money, at all really. It's a far cry from my marriage, where my part time wages were paid into husbands account and I rarely saw a penny of it...despite that, he still managed to get himself into a shit tonne of debt, no idea how. My finest day was actually being able to go to the car showroom, choose and pay for a car that I wanted. Up until that point I had always had whatever crap car EXH decided I could have...now I have a gorgeous silver Ford Ecosport that's my pride and joy!

I love having the freedom to do what I want, when I want to do it, without having to ask anyone's permission. My son always comments on how much I laugh and smile now, he remembers the times when we lived with his Dad and mummy didn't smile or laugh much at all.

I can decorate my house however I like, and if I want to leave the washing up and have a glass of wine in the garden of an evening, I can do so without someone shouting at me!

There's no one to ruin my very occasional nights out with friends by calling me constantly and texting...and then accusing me of being a slut when I arrived home. I stopped going out at all eventually, it wasn't worth the hassle!

I've always wanted very short hair, husband told me that I would just look like a lesbian (whatever that means!) so I didn't cut it. It was the first thing I did when I left that house...and it looks absolutely gorgeous! The same for make up, I wasn't allowed to wear it in case I dared to look even slightly attractive! Now, I always looks immaculate and I get so many people telling me I look stunning, and so well put together!

I think though, most of all, I'm so proud of myself for doing this...when in the beginning I felt like my world had ended. In fact, my world had ended and now I have a very different world, which I absolutely love!

I do still have days where I worry that I might actually spend the rest of my life on my own...but once I remind myself that I'm fine alone, I don't need anyone, and I have my DS, I realise that's okay! If someone comes along who is special enough for me to bring them into our lives then that's great, if not then I'll still be fine! Although, I do like to think that there's someone out there for me...somewhere!

Relocationlocationetc · 14/05/2020 22:21

Thank you, it really helps to hear these stories. Haven't told many friends yet, and worry about burdening them too much as well, esp at the moment. I am doing it in stages, when I'm ready. Feel quite embarrassed about it tbh.

We are in a less amicable phase now, in that he is saying he should stay in the house with kids and I could move to a smaller one. I have higher earnings and had suggested I take on this mortgage myself. It's all quite scary. Love this house and really think having to sell and move would finish me off.

I will have to hope it can be resolved differently. It's exhausting, on top of a v demanding job and 2 DC I'm worried about.

Interesting that the more people I tell, the less doubt I have about my decision though. Just wish I could fast forward a year and look back on it all from a happier position. Sounds like that's where you are!

Again, thanks a lot.

Relocationlocationetc · 14/05/2020 22:32

Also, WhatinFreshHell, it sounds like you're well out of that marriage. I have started making a note of things he does and says, so I can read it if I have any doubt about my decision (which is happening less, I have to say...)

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