Divorce papers

[KindKoala]

Morning all,

This is my first post here so I’m not sure how much information I need to put down - so I’ll go with the basics, please feel free to ask for more if it helps with responses.

This morning I received divorce papers from my husband. His grounds is unreasonable behaviour, I disagree with 2 of his points. Is there a way to have it noted that I believe these are nonsense but not contest the divorce and sign it anyway?

We have a marital home (that I no longer live in, but co-own) and three children (10, 8 & 6). Up until a week or so things were very amicable, unfortunately not now.

He applied for the divorce online through the courts, doesn’t have a solicitor. I have contacted a solicitor, but no idea how I’ll be able to pay for it.

I don’t know what to do next, but I’m aware I only have 7 days to sign and return the papers.

Does anyone have any practical advice please?

The reasons don’t matter. You can note that you disagree but won’t contest. Do you have a solicitor?

The reasons matter to me, because I don’t think they’re true and I’m worried that my children or someone else will see them and I’ll look like a terrible person.

I don’t have a solicitor yet, no. It all went very fast from being separated and amicable to suddenly divorce papers turning up. I have contacted a solicitor this morning and I’m hoping to hear from them today, if not I’ll visit in person after work.

No-one apart from the court staff, the judge, yourselves and your solicitors (if you have them) sees the reasons for your divorce.

Also you can agree to the divorce but not agree the reasons for it.

Hi OP,

I’m in the same situation - I agreed to the divorce but not the reasons.

I was worried about the reasons being used against me for matters like finances and contact but sold assured me that this is not the case.

I wish you well x

On the divorce papers the options are I believe agree, agree but leave comments or contest. My H put comments to say he didn’t agree. But agree with PP no one else will ever know why? It doesn’t make a difference for any financial orders so save yourself some money and just sign the judge will just see it that even if you don’t agree your husband doesn’t want to be married to you. You will need a solicitor for the financial side though and some will allow monthly payments. I’d also check he’s not expecting you to pay the court fee as with unreasonable behaviour he can do that, it would say on the papers xx

Thanks all, I had an appointment with a solicitor yesterday - she was great, really helpful. She completed the form for me, we filled out the box saying I don’t intend to contest the divorce but I don’t agree with point x and y.

Thankfully he knows I’m flat broke and has not ticked the box to say he wants the cost of the divorce back 🤞🏻

Thanks so much everyone!

It's really not that important, my ex husband filed for divorce and cited unreasonable behaviour and how he couldn't be expected to live with me now etc etc.... He was the one who had an affair 😂 I just went along with it, after all there was unreasonable behaviour! On his part!

Hi, I have a question please, ex husband and I have been separated for 4 years and I live in the family home with children. He issued divorce papers 7 months ago on the grounds of 2 years separated with consent which is fine. In that petition he put me down as the respondent to pay the costs of the application. He is using an online divorce solicitor. I wrote back and asked that he pay the cost of the application, I’ve heard nothing for seven months and received another petition with me again down to pay the cost of the application. He is in a better financial position than me to pay this. Should I write back with the same request again. There is also an application for a financial order ticked for him the applicant and the children. We have 4 children, a marital home and he has a rather large nhs pension, tried mediation and that failed. We were together 24 years upon separation. What is my next step, I’m keen to avoid paying solicitors fees until it gets to the point where I can’t deal with it myself.

He is using an online divorce solicitor.

He's trying to keep his costs down. Write back with the request again and find yourself a solicitor asap.

You will have a costs hearing if you don't agree. This will delay things but as he's stupidly refuses mediation and you have other assets to divide you his costs are going to increase anyway.

I suspect he presumes you can't afford a solicitor.

I hope your youngest child is under 14 as he could easily drag out divorce proceedings until they are 18.