mediation or straight to solicitor?

[10yearsandcounting]

Hi everyone, I really need some advice.

I walked away from my husband two years ago. So far no financial settlement has been agreed to. He constantly suggests things, I agree to them, he then gets verbally aggressive and changes his mind. He stopped seeing the children two years ago, but has recently changed his mind and is now stating that I am stopping him seeing them. To be honest, I would prefer it if he did keep his distance. He is a narcissist and his behaviour has influenced my eldest child. But I understand that he is their father and does have a right to see them.

I've now got to the stage where 3 months ago, he told me that he was arranging mediation and I will attend. But no appointment has come through?

I'd really like some advice on what to do next. Do I organise mediation? Or do I go back to the solicitors and try and organise everything through them?

Huge thanks to anyone reading this x

Mediation for what, do you mean for the children or for the divorce? Contact with the children Leave that up to him if he wants to see them and go that route, everything else yes straight to a solicitor and stop letting him mess you around
There's no need to discuss anything with him thus giving him the opportunity to have a go at you when the solicitors are dealing with it you can just walk away if he ever fetches any of it up or not reply to texts etc

I didn't do mediation due to DA. The courts prefer you to have attempted it before going to court, I believe, but it sounds as if he may 'change his mind' on whatever gets agreed? Not sure how legally binding the arrangements that are made in mediation are, I'm afraid - hopefully someone else will come allow with more experience - but I do know it would be a lot cheaper to do it that way!

thank you ladies, it's all just so confusing!

My ex and I never went to mediation regarding anything as he wouldn't agree, or would but never follow through. There was DA in our relationship and because of that I went to solicitors first to arrange proceedings in court. I found out information through cafcass reports that I would never found out otherwise. Good luck in what you choose

Thank you itsme. I have been told I was in a DA relationship and have attended the Freedom Programme. I'm looking at cafcass now xx

Mediation is simply a conversation with a lawyer present. Nothing is binding unless you both agree however it is all minuted / noted.

Suggest you keep issuing invites. If he fails to attend then note them down.

Court is the last and most expensive option