Childcare and Visitation Help

[HelpMeDoThisPlease]

Hi,

I have two daughters (8 and 5) and they see their dad every Saturday and then every other Friday or Saturday they stay over at his.

The summer holidays are coming up, and he is refusing to have them anymore than this arrangement (though when we separated he said he would share school holidays). He pays me only what the Child Maintenance Service calculator have worked out, which for the summer holidays does not come close to covering the extra childcare (I work full time).

He keeps on telling me he wants them 50/50 in the future when he's able to get his own place, instead of staying with his sister. However he earns a lot of money, and could easily take them to an air BnB or something in the summer holidays.

I'm fed up of the wishy washy 'in the future I want more time with them, but I can't say when'. And at this point I think it's fair to say that if he won't have them 50/50 then the permanent arrangement should be how it is atm, and he will just be a weekend dad.

Am I right that if I took him to court it would still be ruled that he wouldn't have to pay for any of their childcare? Also would it be possible to get a ruling that he is responsible for them 50% of the school holidays? I'm guessing not?

Also what is the best way to get an agreement formalized, as I'm sick of having the same conversation with him.

Thanks

Courts try and stay away from maintenance leaving that CMS and that sadly is deemed to be all a parent needs to contribute.
No court order can force an NRP to have their children all is does is force a RP to make the children available.

Can't add anything only echo what has been said. Court can say he needs to cover half school holidays but if he doesn't show up you can't enforce it

I tried all last year offering extra in holidays and got nowhere. So haven't bothered this year. I work out the childcare I need. And do not factor in nrp.

Basically the law leaves you holding the baby. The courts have no idea of the cost of raising a child or paying for childcare in order to earn the money to support that child. CMS money is a joke.

I'd be interested to know what people think is a reasonable amount for children maitenance as everyone complains.
How much do people actually estimate they realistically need per child per week?

@Yellowshirt it is relative to your out goings and nrp earning.

I am lucky (🙄). What I have coming in covers all my bills food petrol and I have few £££ a week in my purse.

The maintenance I'm suppose to get from their father gives me a buffer for shoes/clothes repairs for house/car and holidays etc

Everyone's figures will be different. Dependent on situation and costs.

My children both have swimming lessons and do scouts/ brownies. These aren't essential but I will go without myself before I say I can't afford them. Again I'm lucky my family have help with extra coats like camp/ uniform.

A reasonable person would be sensible and understanding of what it takes to be the primary carer and just what the cost is.

Unfortunately, they're are exs because the are bloody unreasonable and paying a decent amount of maintenance goes a long way to show sensible and reasonable behaviour and a start to an amicable agreeable arrangement for the children.

My ex's excuse for no maintenance is that seeing the DCs for 3 hours a week is sooooooooo expensive.

Your can't make him have them more than he wants to, or make him pay more than CMS. Doesnt mean you aren't right to feel completely frustrated by him though!!

My exH is the kind of idiot who goes to court saying he wants 50/50 (he wasn't awarded it) but in reality rarely has them even when he is meant to 🙄