Hi all this is the first time I've posted, not long been on Mumsnet. so for the last at least 10 years things haven't been right between me and husband. He's been very domineering, controlling and it's always been all about him. Been many times where is been totally unsupportive and cruel, when I really needed help. Suffered bad pnd after 3rd child 6 years ago and was diagnosed with diabetes 2 years ago. His response was that I was weak because I had antidepressants for pnd and would roll his eyes if I mentioned anything to do with diabetes. So in December are after another row finally snapped and told him I was done. He was devastated and promise to go to counselling with me even though he's always said counseling is for weak people. We went to 3 sessions and I agreed to give it another six months to see if things would improve. We then had a massive bust up on New years Eve when he asked me if we had a future and I couldn't answer him. so a New year's Day he told me he hasn't been honest with me in our relationship and said that the reason he had been very domineering and overly masculine was because he had been hiding that he felt feminine and had been overcompensating particularly in the bedroom (absolutely no emotion in the bedroom and there was no enjoyment for me in it for years). He said that he fancied me but had fantasized about being with men but said he didn't want to carry through. He said that he liked feminine things and wanted to make comments to people about looking nice and wanted to drink pink gin instead of pints. He said he thought people would judge him, he's a child of the 60s and is very old fashioned in his ways. His parents are devout Catholic. I'm still not sure he's telling me the whole story but part of what he did say was that he would like me to engage in things sexually with him that I am uncomfortable with and I have told him there is absolutely no way. so six months is now up and I have told him that nothing has changed for me and I am wanting to separate. We have three boys age 14, 11 and 6 and I am really worried about the effect it will have on them. I can afford to buy him out and keep them in the family home but he is refusing to allow me to buy him out and is insisting that if we separate the house is sold and two new houses are purchased. He cannot afford to stay in the family home as I earn more. It feels a complete mess at the moment, really uncomfortable. We don't have a spare room so one of us is spending the night sharing a room on a put up bed with the kids and telling them it's because daddy snores! he totally accept that we are in this situation because of his behaviour and when he has got narky and thrown accusations at me I have stood strong and told him exactly why we are in this position. Sorry for the essay i just needed to pour it all out!! Anyway any support is really appreciated or if anyone has been through a similar situation I'd love to hear your stories x