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What will wife be entitled to in divorce?

14 replies

Dan250 · 02/05/2019 10:53

I have been married since 2012 in what I thought was a happy marriage. We have one child and lived together abroad.
My wife found someone else, had an affair and left my son and I to move back to the UK and begin a new life with her new boyfriend. He left her after 2 weeks, she is now living with her mother. She admits that she was totally in the wrong and I had done nothing to deserve this.
After repeated attempts to come back and my refusal as I know this would happen again, she is now asking for half of everything ranging from a house I have rented out from before we were together, to any savings and my pension. She has worked throughout our marriage but her money was for her spending money and mine was for rent, savings, and cost of living etc.
I understand that she should be entitled to something, but I have worked hard to get the assets together to provide a good level of life for my son and she has said she has no intention of getting any residence of him, she just wants the money. She is on benefits now so I think entitled to legal aid. I have not asked for any maintenance money from her as we initially had an understanding that she didnt want anything from me if I didn't ask her for any money for our son.

Sorry for the long story, but could anyone give me a rough figure of what a court would award her? Would it be around 50/50?

OP posts:
IsItBetter · 02/05/2019 11:15

You haven't given enough detail. How long did the cohabiting relationship last for? Number of children? Age of children? Your job/wages? Her job/wages? Likely split of child care (yes you say she has no intention of getting any residence, but I find that hard to believe)? Savings and assets? Pensions? Debt? Monthly spending?

No one will care about the reason for divorce or who spent what on what during the marriage. She will not be entitled to legal aid under "normal" circumstances.

You are probably best having a chat with a solicitor and many offer a free initial meeting.

CaptSkippy · 02/05/2019 11:19

These situations can be complex. I think you'll need to lawyer to sort that out.

BrightonTony · 02/05/2019 11:46

Back of a fag packet half of everything you accrued while together including pension.

But complex!

Get a free half hour consultation with a solicitor (loads do it) and remember you're in no rush to divorce.

As the resident parent abandoned by the NRP I would 100% rinse all joint accounts and available funds and put in your name, and also ensure you're getting all benefits.

BrightonTony · 02/05/2019 11:47

(Shitty situation btw, sympathies)

purpleboy · 02/05/2019 11:51

Legal advice is the best way forward. Could you possibly put the house in your sons name? And move all money so she can't access it.
Sorry your in this situation, what a shitty thing to do leaving her son.

bibbitybobbityyhat · 02/05/2019 11:56

I'm honestly surprised you think Mumsnet can give you an answer on this! It's a complex and unusual situation. Why not cut out the middle man and just go straight to a solicitor? You'll have a rough idea soon enough.

FreckledLeopard · 02/05/2019 11:59

There are many variables. You don't say what country you're living in, where the marriage took place and as such, which country would have jurisdiction to deal with divorce proceedings.

Assuming you're both in the UK and the English courts have jurisdiction, then the starting point would generally be 50:50 split of assets, but depends on each party's (and the child's) respective needs.

The reason for the marriage breakdown is totally irrelevant to the division of assets, so do bear this in mind.

You need legal advice from a solicitor.

MrsBertBibby · 02/05/2019 19:26

You need proper advice in the country where you live. How long has she been back in England ( or is she Scotland / NI?)

MrsBertBibby · 02/05/2019 19:38

Also, where are the assets located?

BogglesGoggles · 02/05/2019 19:43

You will need legal advice. I strongly reccomend you file for divorce where you are. England & Wales jurisdiction is unusually generous towards lower earning spouses. It depends on where you are but chances are you will get a better settlement if you file first. There may be an attempt to move to England and Wales jurisdiction but I mn not sure legal aid would cover that (or be capable of even thinking if that to be really frank with you). Act pre-emptively. Drain all joint accounts. See a lawyer, if you jurisdiction is better then file for divorce where you are.

ChiaraRimini · 02/05/2019 20:02

No one except a solicitor can give you any sensible view on this. But if she's skint and on benefits the chance of her taking you to court is low.

MrsBailey2be · 03/05/2019 12:19

Currently going through something very similar & extremely stressful with DF EXW, please get advice from a solicitor, even if it's the free 30 minute consultation. That's what we did & ours seems to be much more complicated than your explanation, not saying yours isn't btw, I feel for you seriously.
I can tell you a few things our solicitor told us though - EXW would only be entitled to legal aid if she could prove abuse with hosp/police reports & much much more evidence etc would be needed, it's all changed now so don't worry about that unless you literally are a wife beater - guessing not!!
Also every case is now completely different & looked at on it's own merits. The days of 50/50 are long gone & is more of a myth now although many people still believe this is the case, it isn't.

We are going through 2 divorces at present, mine, very amicable all agreed out of court, no solicitors, papers for divorce done between us & submitted ourselves saving us thousands, jobs a good 'un.

DF, absolute nightmare, solicitor involved etc etc

Do whatever you need to do to protect you & your DS no matter what.

Good luck OP

Wallywobbles · 03/05/2019 13:11

Where were you married. Outside UK then their rules apply. I think you'd need to be resident in the UK for 6 months before you can divorce there.

MrsBertBibby · 03/05/2019 18:52

It is utterly irrelevant where the marriage took place.

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